Time isn’t infinite !

Have you ever been stuck driving for more than 3 hours in a car without stopping? The other day, what was supposed to be just a 3 hour drive turned out to be a 4 hour ordeal just for one way. In the entirety of my trip, I was on the road for almost 8 hours with only a brief stop for less than 3 hours.

From that trip I reflected two core things that I think many would resonate;

As we get older, time and energy are extremely precious.
It sucks not to have the upper hand and deciding things.

I was supposed to be doing a lot of my backlogs but ended up missing 7 hours of my time doing nothing but sitting inside a car. I couldn’t complain either because first, I just got back from church but then I said yes to this adventure. I didn’t even bring my card or extra money just so if anything happens, I could arrange something. I was with a tiniest bag I owned and a little cash that wouldn’t mean anything.

That trip reminded me of how I was fine with hours of layover, sitting in long trains without the ability to access my laptop or do some work.I didn’t really care if my time was wasted because I used to think time is infinite and nothing really mattered if I lost a day or two by resting. These days, as I got older, I realized how those don't apply anymore. These days I need more time recuperating and even wanting to have less stress while moving around. My tolerance to stress, crowd and even extreme unpredictability are a lot lower than before.

I've been noticing how by choosing faster travel time and more convenient ways to travel, I was paying for my energy and my own sanity. I didn't even feel that tired in comparison when I opt for something cheaper that at face value, I might save money but not actually not really. It's like my energy, time and everything were wasted on recovering.

This time, since the trip was initiated by my aunt, I had nothing to say about it all. We didn’t pay for the gas or even offered to drive. So, whatever they did, we just followed it. Honestly, that sucks. If it were up to me, I wouldn't mind paying for a hotel, stopping more than a couple of time and stretch especially during such a long car ride But to them, it was something fine. I was like that too in the past, just going all the way thinking that we’d save more time not our energy. In my mind, I thought I could work right after but voila, wasted time and I became a bit grumpy.

In reality, I think as we age, energy is our most prized possession. Even with having time, without energy, it will be meaningless. I don’t think I would ever sign up for this type of trip especially when I have so many obligations and things to do. I know, it was partly my fault for being that adventurous.

Did I have a good time and saw something good?

I wouldn’t like that I didn’t. I got to see some interesting stuff on the way and I got to see a place that I haven’t visited for more than almost a decade. It’s interesting how things don’t really change much there but also reminds me that I haven’t seen a lot of parts of the east java that I didn’t know but once I got home, I was extremely exhausted.

It was the kind of exhaustion that I would sleep 3-4 days straight for but because I had many obligations and this wasn’t possible. It’s like now, I have to do it tired. All this could be anticipated and now I realized why some people prefer comfort and saving time than saving money. In the end, we all value what we value.

I reflected a lot on my younger days when I thought being cheap means I could stretch more resources but that’s not entirely true. Sometimes, it ended up costing us more because the real thing that we need in life is energy. So, conserving our energy and finding ways to do so matters more to me than others.

The other day when I was traveling with my mom, we had some comfortable options and I was even able to work and do my thing. I wasn’t too tired to think and honestly when I am tired, I get a bit grumpy and wanted to get things done more quickly than I should. Well, as result of being grumpy and tired to think, I tend to overpay for things and being careless about a lot of things. So, it's quite a disaster 😄

Oh and it sucks not to have an upperhand. I thought about this a lot yesterday when I wasn’t on the steering wheel deciding things. Unfortunately, we didn’t want to suggest otherwise either and that sucks. But I was so thankful in the end that I was taken to some random adventures albeit being exhausted and felt like I was hit by a truck.

These days, whenever I go out with my friends, I prioritize my convenience and comfort. I didn't mind paying my friends extra as long as during the train, I get the comfort I needed than you know, stuck in traffic for hours or having extremely long delays and multiple layovers.

That's all the reflection I got this weekend!