There was a time when someone made a wrong assumption about me, and honestly, it was not a good feeling at all. It happened back when I was in polytechnic, when one of our friends was getting married.
As friends, we had all agreed on how much each person would contribute towards the wedding. It was something we discussed together, and I was also willing to contribute my own share. There was no reason for me not to want to support my friend because she was someone I cared about.
Unfortunately, around that time, I was having problems with my bank account. I could not make the transfer when everyone else was sending their money. I explained what was happening to some of my friends, hoping they would understand and give me some time to sort things out.
But instead, some of them assumed that I simply did not want to contribute. To them, it looked like I was deliberately avoiding the contribution. I remember feeling really bad about it because I knew that was not the case. I was not trying to avoid helping my friend or pretending that I did not care about her wedding. I genuinely had an issue with my bank account that was beyond my control at that moment.
What hurt me the most was that it felt like my explanations did not mean anything to them. No matter what I said, they had already made up their minds about me. Sometimes, when people have already decided what they believe about a situation, explaining yourself can feel useless because they are not really listening anymore.
At first, I was angry and disappointed. I kept asking myself why they could not just believe me or give me the benefit of the doubt. I also felt embarrassed because I did not want my friends to think I was the kind of person who would willingly refuse to support another friend during such an important moment.
Still, I decided not to let the situation turn into a big argument. I knew what my intentions were, and I knew the truth about what had happened. Instead of fighting with everyone about it, I focused on solving the problem with my bank account.
Eventually, I was able to sort everything out and I sent the money to my friend. The only problem was that I sent it after the wedding had already taken place. Even though I was late, I still wanted her to have my contribution because my intention had always been to support her.
Looking back now, that experience taught me something about people and assumptions. Sometimes, people only see the part of the situation that is in front of them and make conclusions without knowing what is happening behind the scenes. They saw that I had not sent the money and assumed I did not care, but they did not see the problem I was dealing with.
It also taught me not to be too quick to judge people myself. If someone does something that I do not understand, I would rather ask questions than immediately assume the worst about them. We never really know what another person might be going through.
The whole experience made me feel hurt at the time, but it also made me understand the importance of patience, communication and giving people the benefit of the doubt. Sometimes, what we see is not the complete story.
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