What do you call a 13 year old girl from Kentucky who can run faster than her six brothers? A virgin.
If I ever say, ""Do you want me to be honest?"" Say no.
Wife: He keeps his friend close so he doesn't lose him Therapist: Not a bad thing Me [yawns and a bee flies from my mouth]: Come back Alan
Just heard local reports of a stalker, which is funny because I watch everyone through their windows and none of them look suspicious
So a photon checks into a hotel... Bellman says ""Sir may I take your bags?"" Photon replies ""Nah... I'm traveling light""