If God made everything... Is God Chinese?
I used the toilet just after my wife and noticed that her shit really does smell of roses. Hardly surprising. She's polished off four tins of the fuckers in the last two days
Some coworkers remind me of my ex, because I would jump in front of a bus to get out of a conversation with them too.
How many hippies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Hippies don't screw in light bulbs, they screw in tents.
Coworker *parks Prius Coworker 2 *locks bike up Me *bounces by on jumping exercise ball made of recycled tires* POSERS!