""WHAT DO WE WANT?"" ""Hearing aids."" ""WHEN DO WE WANT THEM?"" ""Hearing aids.""
What do you get when you cross a mexican, a queer, and an eskimo? A snow-blower that doesn't work.
A girl tells her parents she's going to major in psychology ""Hey mom! Hey dad! I'm gonna study a real science! PSYCH!""
A gambling addict begins his 5th stretch of therapy... ""It failed 4 times in a row, so it's bound to work this time.""
Accidentally called 911. Set my house on fire to not look stupid.