My dog ate itself I think he's Asian
[approaches parent with child on a leash] ""Mind if I pet your dog?"" Hey that's my son! ""Oh my bad. Mind if I pet your son?""
Two 5th graders are doing Math homework. One tells the other, ""I don't know what 99 is in Roman numerals."" The other lowers her glasses and says, ""IC.""
What do you call a deaf lesbian? Earmuff
BREAKING: An egg. I'm making scrambled eggs.
