I haven't spoken to my wife in weeks... I didn't want to interrupt her.
Why did Faraday shop at the discount bird cage store? Because of their great buy one, get one free of charge deals.
Where do you put people with ADHD? A concentration camp
My neighbor won't give me a straightforward answer, he's always beating around the bush. Every time I ask why he just says ""fuck you Gerald, it's my bush and I'll masturbate here if I want to""
Assuming Twitter is legally binding, when I die, please wrap me in a giant ball of burrata as this is my greatest wish. Thank you.