Roses are red, Violets are Blue .. Nothing poetic, they are just facts.
Playing hide and seek in my office building because they can't fire you if they can't find you.
Shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is.
Plastic silverware: because the only thing I hate more than poisoning the environment is washing dishes.
""why aren't you in school?"" ""i'm too cool for school, officer."" *checks cop computer* ""checks out, youre free to go."" kid is undercover nerd