Someone told me that women live to be woken up with oral sex... ... but when I tried it my wife woke up and said ""WTF get that thing out of my mouth!!""
How to be part of a joke? One must simply walk into a bar
HER: Let me know when you get your shit together. ME: So I guess this is goodbye.
Tech support in the military Troubleshoot to kill.
Jokes about wife. First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!' Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive. LOL