What do Bud Light and having sex in a canoe have in common? They're both fucking close to water.
BAD COP: Throw the book at him. GOODREADS COP: OK! Check out Ruby, the beautiful and devastating debut novel by Cynthia Bond. 12
The midget fortune teller who kills his customers is a small medium at large.
Why didn't Mark Watney get any pussy on Mars? Curiosity killed the cat
What does a gang member do when he arrives at work first thing in the morning? He Glocks in