Stay through the end of Hansel & Gretel to see Nick Fury kick Jeremy Renner out of The Avengers.
Women: Think of every guy you have ever been friends with. He has jerked off to you. Good talk.
I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer I have no idea what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.
Old tourist joke German tourist arrives at a French airport. Immigration officer asks him: ""Occupation?"" The German replies: ""No, no, just visiting.""
Star Wars newest Droid..... How does the newest round Star Wars droid relieve his sexual tension? He master-BB8's