I have change over the course of years, curently i have grown cold to they things i love.
Neither do i sleep with ease and comfort, i try to create a delussional image and leave with it, to give my self a temporary peace but its all a temporary state of calmness. They things, people that i value sometimes, no longer give me a joy. I don't know if am going insane or am losing my mind. Sometimes, i wonder if nature knows i co-exits, and if it can ever offer something good.
I try not to lose people that are dear to me but its not working. They world is a cruel place in which i inhabitate which i know, I try to stay true to people but am been taking for a laughing staock. I am depressed, i need a saviour to come save in this comforting in this comfounding and depressed state.
I am sick and tired, my bones are waxing old, if only i can see the light at the end of the tunnel, it will be a big relief to me. Most times i get tired of existing. If only a voice can whisper from the wind and guid me in a right and straight path way, it will be over whelming with such intervention. I always know that am a wandrer, a sojourner which i came to conclusion that i was never made to habitat a particular region or colony permanentely but to sail across different traditions, nature, tribes, cultures and entire civilization and socialization. My entire existence is a question to me, do you feel the rage i feel when not having money at hand?
I don't feel happy waking up this morning been in a very poor environment that do support my ideas, i feel paranoid this morning knowing there is no electricity to begin with, no food to eat, no friends to beckon on, no phone calls nor text messages. With the disabled government of my time still in power, can you imaging your self talking to a stone? thats how it feels to be in my position.
