Most of you don't know me and I haven't been nominated to participate in this challenge either (so far?)... But I figured that I could make at least one, final blog post where I literally pour my heart out in an article I've spent several hours on to finalize. Much like I have done during the majority of my time on STEEM. Especially the part about spending a lot of time on my articles, as I had an average of around 3 hours per article at one point.
I am from Sweden and I am not native in English. This means that there probably will be a bunch of grammar- or spelling errors in this article, but I'm okay with that as long as I can communicate decent enough so others can understand. This is also one of the things I am grateful for. I am grateful for the opportunity STEEM has given me, both in terms of making friends and earning crypto, but also that I am allowed to train myself and that I am able to learn from others.
I have become a better person since I joined STEEM in some aspects. I can only thank STEEM for the opportunity and some really cool people I have met during my time here for that.
These three things are without a doubt the most important things I am grateful for. While most people might think that everyone obviously would be grateful for any amount of extra money in their pockets, STEEM has given me so much more than that. It is true that I have basically "pissed away" thousands of STEEM in total during my time here, but here and there, on several occassions, the extra money I have been able to earn from STEEM has helped me tremendously in real life. I have been, and I was able to earn that extra money due to my own hard work, but I would never have reached the amounts I had without the amazing and wonderful support from my audience. My audience, a group of fantastic individuals, many of them wonderful friends, even though I've never met a single soul in real life...
I don't really know where to start... But I guess we'll start from the beginning. One last time.
I earned 18 cents on my introduction post in July 2016. I joined STEEM because one of my former co-workers told me about it. He wasn't successful but he showed me dozens of people who where extremely lucky at the time.
I had heard about bitcoin but I had no idea what a "blockchain" was, and I was working full time as a freelancer so I didn't have time to waste something pointless. Especially not a mumbo jumbo currency that someone had created on his own... I was a cash-person. Money talks, you know? - But I wasn't rich or anything, I was just not interested in anything that I couldn't feel with my own hands. I lived in real life, where I could have money in my hands.
Why would I be interested in some sort of money that didn't even exist, well, that did exist, but only in cyberspace...?
However, I finally decided to join STEEM, my former co-worker had to talk about it for weeks before I finally decided to join. Long before I decided to join I was on STEEM reading introduction posts and other articles... That $-symbol on the article was definitely tempting.
I was working as a freelancer. Brand building was my main business. I had worked with dozens of really talented article writers. I had paid dozens of talented article writers hundreds of dollars for outstanding articles...
Suddenly, I see someone on STEEM. Obviously a girl with some cleavage, who seems to earn almost $1000 for a garbage introduction post? - Who is Ned? Dan? Berniesanders? Blocktrades? Something is messed up for sure...
It didn't took long before I had published my own introduction post. I scored a wooping 18 cents, and I was about to give up... But I decided to give it one more try.
I published a short post about what I've seen so far. About "boobs" being highly rewarded, and I suddenly earnings of $40. Some of the users who upvoted those "boob"-posts paid me to read this too...?
And here's the thing, I still didn't understand where the money came from. I actually thought that these users where idiots who somehow paid me to post, but they paid whatever amount they wanted too, after they used my "service" which basically was when they had read what I wrote.
It was crazy, but I was so extremely in to my freelancing-thoughts, and I worked with different types of services for 16 hours per day, so it was impossible to think in other ways than that. Anyhow, I continued to post, still skeptical though, because I wasn't convinced that I would be able to withdraw the money I had earned...
21 posts later, with mixed results, I suddenly hit the jackpot:
My next post after that:
Steem(it) started to feel extremely weird, but after I had successfully cashed out some of the money I had earned prior to that, even though it was extremely difficult, I started to feel that I had finally, for once in my life stumbled upon a true treasure chest.
I continued to post articles on a daily basis, and the results followed. Mixed results as before, with a few really big hitters. $500, $800 etc. It felt amazing to take my girlfriend (ex nowadays) to a fancy restaurant I couldn't really afford before I joined STEEM. It felt even more awesome to take her shopping some new clothes, help her to pay a bill and whatever I did... It was awesome. I felt like the greatest man alive.
I wasn't rich by any means at all, but that extra income made my life easier. It helped me, (me and my girlfriend) to "live life" for a short amount of time. And the best part about it, was that we didn't have to worry at all about the costs, because the money I used was free money I had been given for some half-assed articles I had published on a weird platform where people gave away thousands of dollars per day...
A very long story short, I realized that people didn't pay me like here you have $5 for a service, they "paid" me with the use of upvotes. I learned along the way and I finally understood things better.
STEEM still didn't made much sense to me, but I loved the idea and the concept about it... But everything was still so new and I was still so amazed to see all the awesome things going on.
So, before diving further, I can easily say that I am grateful for the rewards, but this was far from the main reason for that. This was just the tip of the iceberg.
I honestly can't remember if I had already quit Facebook entirely before I joined STEEM or not, but STEEM was not the reason I quit Facebook. I just couldn't stand it anymore. I hated social media, because I wasn't interested anymore... The same friends posting the same crappy photo of their oatmeal-breakfast, or shitty training gear before heading to the gym... Stuff like that. Nope. That wasn't for me.
However, STEEM gave me another chance. Or, I gave social media another chance with STEEM. The money was obviously a superb bonus, I would lie if I said otherwise, but for some reason, I enjoyed reading peoples stories on STEEM. It was different from what I was used to on Facebook. It didn't feel like lies and bullshit. People felt real and genuine on STEEM. That was the major reason I got hooked.
Decentralised, centralised? - That didn't matter at all. I honestly couldn't care less about that, but users on STEEM felt real. It felt great to read random peoples blogs for some reason... I don't know why, but it gave me some satisfaction.
So, with me being addicted to STEEM, I obviously started to talk to a bunch of different people on a regular basis. Through comments. I wrote comments, they replied and vice versa.
The price of STEEM went down, up, down and down again... The money became almost worthless, especially for someone like me who actually joined because of the money.
Along this epic journey of mine, I also struggled a handful of times. I struggled and I didn't know when to post, what to post, or even if I should continue... But
He was not even trying to make me stay, because I hadn't publicly told anyone about my thoughts about leaving, but due to him being genuine, kind and awesome, he encouraged me, without even knowing it... And I am truly grateful for it.
Fast forward several months, perhaps even a year or so... And
I had never had that much of an impact ever before, and I successfully upvoted 1000 users per week. Manually. This was, and still is, my best memory so far. I love to help others and I love to give... So it was truly amazing to be put in that sort of position.
You see, my life isn't that great and I suffer from panic attacks, anxiety and depression. I have been struggling with these things since my father passed away and to focus on others makes things easier. I still struggle, but if I can make someone smile, my own shit disappears for a moment.
It might sound a bit weird, and it's hard to explain, but that's basically it, in a nutshell. When the SOG initiative was cancelled, I decided to delegate my own stake to others. I didn't have much, around 1K STEEM or so, but I delegated all of it to a handful of other Steemians. All of them users I had never met in real life.
We launched the 
After that came the "push people"-projects. I ran two versions of it and both were successful. I was also involved in the biggest push in the history of STEEM, with 
With that being said, I am obviously grateful for all of those things too.
I have been unmotivated, discouraged and I have felt despair on more than one occasion throughout my journey. I have found my way back due to the help of my friends, my audience and the community...
It feels different this time though. Things have changed, both on STEEM and in life. 3 years is a long time and I am honored and grateful for everything. Thank you.
