I could remember a particular time I traveled to a nearby state, and before I could even introduce myself, one of the people in the room asked me if I was "so-and-so's son." He said he has studied my face, and he saw the resemblance already. I unusually get a lot of these even from people I have not met before and am just meeting for the first time. He had known my father for a long while; he categorically told me that they had been friends long before he even married, and something in how I walked and stood and, most importantly, my facial appearance, sold me out completely. And to be honest, there was a time I didn't like this because most of the places I go to, I'm always recognized easily. But now I think I like it when people ask, "Are you the son of so-and-so?" It's a kind of flex now.
And this has happened more than once. I have never heard strangers naming or asking my siblings that question, always me even before I named myself. And to be honest, when things started, I didn't see what all of them were seeing when I looked at myself in the mirror. And what people always say, especially those from his family side, is that he carries the likeness of his own mother, a woman who I barely knew myself. And just in that chain, a similar face passed down through someone I can't fully picture settled itself onto mine when I didn't ask for permission. For years, I resisted this comparison, though it was an outright rejection, and I'll just say in my mind, "I don't seem to see the resemblance," but people always see it right away, but I didn't recognize it enough.
Well, our facial resemblance was just the start, though. I'm always punctual in the same specific way he's punctual, though not always, but when it's a place I need to get to on time, I am. In fact, they always meet me there rather than waiting for me. Just like the way he handles his money, I do likewise. Always being prudent and counting twice before spending once. And anytime there is an argument either worth winning or losing the peace over, I've seen myself just like him, always choosing peace even when it's obvious that I was right.
Even though I'm not as sound as him when it comes to things of God, spreading love, and some of these good examples from a man of God, I caught myself saying similar things sometimes, and recently, I caught myself halfway using his comforting words to someone, especially a specific bible verse he usually says in situations like that.
Not everything traces back to him. I got some things from my mother too because she taught me how to cook, how to compose herself under pressure, how she shows people love, feeds them, checks in on others, and her act of hospitality. And nothing about this came from my dad's side at all.
And I feel the resemblance that a lot of people always comment on is actually the least important one. The parts that most people don't usually pay attention to are my instinct towards peace, coping, and traits from my mother because these are the parts I have seen myself grow into recognizing as mine.
Thank you for reading.
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