'Turn it off?'If you have watched the seasonal movie Vampire Diaries, I'm pretty sure most of us have binged at some point, and this phrase turn it off will be familiar to you. To make it clearer for those who haven't, it is simply one of the perks of becoming a vampire, they can choose to turn off their humanity to make them feel no emotions, or whatsoever that causes them emotional pain, care, empathy and even love.
You must be wondering how this connects to the current hive learner writing edition, learning and unlearning, well, it does for me. Unfortunately for me, or maybe fortunately in some cases, I have a heart that loves and care a lot, be it for a family, friend or even a stranger i just met that seems to need some empathy, but the downside to this personality is that i often get hurt a lot because i care a lot, and like they say, the people that we love the most hurt us the most, so just like the movie, i'm learning to turn it off, well, not my humanity, I can't do that, but limit the amount of love, care and attention I pour into relationships.
Rather than give my all, I'm learning to create a sort of balance, so that I don't get hurt as much as I often used to. I'm learning to return the same amount of energy I receive, and when I choose to give care and attention, it must be to the extent where I am not even expecting it in return.
I'm not so good at keeping friends or having a true BFF, at least since I left secondary school due to this very reason. The last time I tried still ended up with the same pattern. I had a friend, at least I thought she was, because she was always reaching out to me for anything she needs, be it advice, financial help, and often times to make her new clothes, and this was while I was heavily pregnant, I didn't mind, I was glad to be of help because I thought, I finally had a good friend, but guess what hapened the moment I gave birth, she disappeared and didn't even give me a call for a whole two months with the excuse of being busy, what kind of friend does that? I felt deeply hurt, bitter, and used, and vowed never again to be that naive.
Some people are only after what they can get from you and are not genuinely happy for you. So the best thing to do in that case is save your emotions, turn it off, the only true people you owe to give your all emotions to are your children, because you are responsible for them and their emotional development. For everyone else, you should be mindful and create a balanced approach to how you share your emotions; it is not selfishness, but a necessary act of self-preservation. It allows you to maintain your warmth and capacity for love without being repeatedly drained or wounded by those who might not cherish it as you do. Protect your energy.
Image is mine, edited using AI
