It's for you

I would say I couldn't be in a relationship without equality, generosity, integrity, spirit, kindness and humor. And awesomeness.

- Jennifer Aniston -

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I've met some truly incredible people in my life who have inspired me greatly and mostly I've found all have a common trait: Generosity.

My father has been one of the greatest influences on me and was generous to a fault, sometimes to his own detriment, (incredibly humble too), and it rubbed off on me thankfully.

I deploy it somewhat differently however; my father and I had different lives and experiences and I tend to be a reward for effort guy, meaning I'm generous towards those who are actively working towards their own best outcomes rather than romping around flinging handfuls of money around like a weirdo. I'm more generous when it comes to supporting those who work to support themselves be it financially, emotionally or otherwise because they deserve it.

There's occasions when I simply feel like applying random generosity though and recently one such moment occurred.

I arrived at a café I frequent and ordered up my coffee and sat in my booth to work. A little later I overheard a couple next to me chatting about their finances; I shouldn't have eavesdropped but I did and it saddened me to hear how tightly they operate financially. They moved off a short time later but I wondered how many people I pass each day who are in the same situation and so I decided to do something nice for a few people.

I spoke to the owner, a girl I know well, and got her to charge $50 to my credit card and offer the next ten people a free cake or coffee. I went back to my booth and resumed working.

About an hour or so later she came over with a coffee for me, a free one, and sat down. She said some nice things to me then proceeded to tell me she'd doubled up my offer and actually had given the next twenty customers a free coffee or cake. That's cool right?

Generosity pays off, it feels good.

Also, in her case those twenty people will remember it and will talk about the random act of kindness they'd received at the café; that's great advertising and the café owner knew it. For me, well I felt so great to have added a little highlight to a few people's day and to have inspired the café owner to do the same; it didn't matter that those people didn't know it was from me, I knew. I left a little while later feeling uplifted and happier than when I'd arrived and that was my reward, a good feeling.

Each of us are in a relationship (of sorts) with ourselves and to keep things on track we need to treat it like any external relationship I think. We need to nurture our thoughts and attitudes as it's those combined that inspire our actions and outcomes. Being our best selves doesn't just happen, it takes work and usually in giving, we also receive, and that feeds the soul making us better individuals...which helps us give a little more...it's a nice little cycle I think.

I believe one of the things that truly defines a person is what they do when no one is looking and with this in mind I work towards being the best version of me as I can be, and generosity is one element of that. I fail at hitting the mark so much, anyone who says otherwise is a liar or delusional, but having the continual improvement ethos in mind helps those failures to pay dividends down the track.

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I wonder if you've ever done such a thing or been the recipient of a small gesture of generosity or act of kindness like this? What was the situation and how did it make you feel...did you pay it forward? Has your life been impacted by someone's generosity or have yours impacted positively on someone else's? Feel free to comment below if you have any stories, or just want to comment in general, I'd enjoy hearing from you.