Children have a lesson adults should learn, to not be ashamed of failing, but to get up and try again. Most of us adults are so afraid, so cautious, so 'safe,' and therefore so shrinking and rigid and afraid that it is why so many humans fail. Most middle-aged adults have resigned themselves to failure.
- Malcolm X -
Making it. What does that mean? When a person uses the phrase it suggests they have achieved a goal, reached a destination or gained the success they were looking for. I don't mean so much a point A to point B physical journey here, more a process of doing things that carry one forward to the realisation of a task. It could be a relationship, work, personal or sporting goal I guess, plus many others. Making it, means different things to different people as it's personal.
Fake it until you make it, is another phrase I've heard many times, the most recent of which was this week when someone told me that's what they intended to do in their work scenario. I nodded and smiled, but in my head I was thinking, nope, that's not right. I call, bullshit, on the phrase and think it's one of the worst pieces of advice someone could give...and it's even worse to take on the advice and deploy it. That's just my opinion folks, it's ok if you disagree.
Face it until you make it, is a slight twist on the former phrase mentioned and, for myself at least, it's a more responsible way to move forward.
Face it until you make it, means different things to different people, but for me it means many things and, should I list and explain them all here, the post would be very long; don't worry, I'll not bore you totally, just maybe a little bit. Read on if you wish.
To me the phrase prompts me to get up and take action. Activity creates activity and by getting the hell up and taking action one is more likely to move forward. Of course, the right actions must be taken as we're looking for positive movement, not negative. For many this action-phase can be the most difficult to begin and that's where ownership and discipline are required.
From there comes effort; I like to say massive action. This encompasses such words as persistence, perseverance, accountability and the ability to get a little uncomfortable. Achievement doesn't always come easily, indeed it rarely does, so one must strive for it, work hard. I'm not sure if there's another way to be honest, for me there's not been. Getting after it, pursuing one's goals with passion and effort, is the only real way to attain those things we wish to reach and then...along comes failure.
Failure is the constant companion of success and it generally happens no matter how hard we try to avoid it; that's why I don't try to avoid it. Indeed, I have a fail often mentality because in doing so it means I tried often as well. The fear of failure holds one back and if one fails to move, act and make an effort, one has already failed. So, failure comes regardless.
What I find excellent about failure is that it crosses off one more way of what not to do from the list, and that it doesn't kill me, or hasn't yet.
It's not whether one failed or not that matters, in fact failure is a great teacher; it allows one to re-evaluate, strategize, plan and redeploy with a renewed vigour. What is also advantageous about failure is that it brings the opportunity to self-motivate, reflect then show some more ownership by standing the fuck up and facing the task, and its various elements once again. Facing it again. It's not an overall negative thing when failure occurs, just something that happens when one takes action.
Once a person has done that, stood up and taken another step, they're on a righteous path. You see, it's not what went wrong that matters, it's what a person does when things go wrong that matters. When a person stands up they're accepting the challenge as above, the action, effort fail and stand up challenge. One may fail again, but one may succeed also. From here...It's simple...Fail again, try again, fail again, try again...until success is found, or a determination is made to pivot to different directions, at which point the cycle starts all over again focused on the new goal.
All of this may mean little to those reading it however to me this simple cycle means everything, and it permeates all aspects of my life from professional to personal and my use of this process has been instrumental in attaining failure...and has brought a lot of success. I am physically here, alive, because I applied this strategy to my life and, whilst I've failed many times, I've succeeded many times also.
I don't believe faking it until one makes it is much of an option. It brings rise to half-assed efforts with no strategy, an inability to focus on the goal and doesn't equip a person with the tools, skills and the attributes required to achieve true success. Facing it, on the other hand, gives one the tools and impetus to step forward, the understanding that one is responsible for one's thoughts, efforts and action and that it's ok to fail...if one learns from it and stands up again.
Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default - Tomorrow isn't promised so be humble and kind
The image is mine
