I've been dealing with depression most of my life but it got really bad in 2019. There were a lot of changes happening all at the same time, my wife had our third child in January and my mother was on her death bed
On top of all that I was starting a new job. I found myself getting so bad I couldn't function. First thing I turned to was alcohol it got so bad I was going to work drunk and walking around smelling like liquor.
One day in the middle of the mall parking lot I broke down crying, I was so disappointed in myself. My mother was an alcoholic and I promised myself I would never be that way.
I Confessed to my wife about my drinking and instead of judging me
She just held me and said we will get through this. I decided to stop drinking which is a good thing but I felt like I was back at square one. Still dealing with this crippling depression that was not allowing me to live my life in a productive manner.
One day I was talking to a friend and they said I should try edibles he said edibles really helped him with his depression and anxiety. The problem is I've never been a big marijuana user. I hate the smell, I don't smoke and I've never truly seen the point of it, but I was desperate so I decided to give it a shot. The next day my friend showed up with a goodie bag of edibles. All types of treats, brownies, gummies, lollipops and everything you can think of, he gave me some tips. And said Don't eat too much. He told me about all the bad experiences he had and he wanted to make sure my first time wasn't dramatic.
So around 10: 00pm I decided to try it. I took a small piece of a brownie and sat back and waited for it to take effect, around 45 minutes I could tell it was starting to hit me. I started to feel calmer, less anxious and more relaxed when I say l was in love I was head over heels. I never felt such relief for my depression and anxiety I took enough to get relaxed but not so much that I couldn't function. So it was a good balance. The first day I tried it was a Friday and I stayed high the whole weekend and when Monday came around and I had to go back to work I noticed I didn't need it. It was almost like my brain went on vacation for the weekend and I came back relaxed ready to tackle the world.
So now that's my routine. If I get into a really bad depressive spell, I buy some edibles and get high the whole weekend allowing my brain to take a break from all the constant worrying, constant overthinking and constant depression. What I find is after a weekend or two of doing this My depression and anxiety is at bay for a couple months and I'm able to function.
I truly believe edibles saved my life because it gave me a way to mentally shut down when I need to and the ability to take on the world.
