I was on YouTube today and I came across a video where I was talking about how young men fail just because they are trying to solve all their family's problems and how it affects them so badly financially. At a young age they couldn’t save up just because they were trying to save their family from poverty and what the video was talking about was how you should avoid family responsibilities so that you can grow as a person. What the video was saying is right and it is a major problem in Africa, but it neglects the real cause which is emotion.
When you advise people not to help their family because anybody who is trying to solve our problem shall die, you often neglect the fact that money is an emotion. Most people who say things like this don’t have an extended family or their family that is doing well or they are people who are emotionally disconnected from their family, so they don’t understand why people make such decisions.
It is all emotion
I have friends who don’t joke with their money and hardly give anybody their money. Still, when it comes to their family, their mother and their brothers they are so vulnerable and they can go to great lengths just to provide for their family. I used to blame people why they can’t control their spending because they are not the ones who gave birth to their brothers, they shouldn’t be taking care of them and advised friends to manage their finances and to stop giving their family money not until I fall into the exact situation and this makes me realize that it is all emotions and they are not fools.
Most people who spend money on their families are not fools, they know how bad and how there are family responsibilities are affecting them but they find it so difficult to see their family in need while they have an abundance and they can’t provide. It is almost impossible for people to watch their mother go hungry and choose not to provide for all in the name of building finances. I know that some family do too much by trying to extort people that are rich in the family, but still doesn’t neglect the fact that they are family and you will always feel the need to take care of them, provide and not let them go homeless, but what you can’t do to save yourself is have policy.
Be strict
One of the things I’ve come to realize is that family tend to use those who can’t control their emotions. We have some family members who will use your emotions against you when they realize that you can’t control your emotions. You are always available and you find it difficult to say no to them. They begin to extort you and they will always come back but what you can do to protect yourself and your finances is to be strict. What I mean by strict is that you’re not stopping from giving them money but you have a budget for them and it is a strict budget that will allow you to save and also provide.
Not all of us can take it to see our families become homeless, to see our mother beg for food on the road but we should be wise about our money. We should not let our emotions control us into spending our future. We can always create a budget that will give room for us room for our growth and to also take on little responsibilities that could help our family. Indeed, you can not solve all your family problems but you can always provide that won’t be detrimental to your future and your finances.
Thanks for your time.
