☎️ "Hi Pete, I created a support ticket, but nobody has got back to me?"
👨 "Actually, you were sent a response, I saw it. It explained that you don't have any support with us, but we can look at it; however, it would be chargeable."
☎️ "But I bought the computer from you guys!"
👨 "That's correct. Is there a problem with the computer? Has the hard drive failed or something?"
☎️ "When I'm in an Excel spreadsheet..............."
👨 "WHOAH, hold on there. That's a software problem. You'll need to speak with Microsoft or maybe look on the internet if you don't want to pay us to look at it."
☎️ "So if I buy a computer from you, you won't repair it?"
👨 "It's not broken. You have a software problem with, I presume, M365 or Office 2021, whichever you bought from elsewhere?"
☎️ "I already had a disc."
👨 "Would you like us to look at it as a chargeable?"
☎️ "Na, you're alright, I'll sort something out."
🙈
✉️ "I've been working on our website the last few days, and I just updated the WordPress version, and now I just have a white page. Can you have a look at it for me, please?"
📨 "We just host the website; you don't have any support from us to maintain the website; however, it sounds like the 'White page of death' to me. Have a look at this link, or I can look at it, but it'll be chargeable."
✉️ "Do you know how long it would take to fix? Or can you point me in the right direction?"
🧠 So let me get this straight. You want me to point you in the right direction, i.e., tell you how to fix it so that you don't have to pay me?
Oh, and how long is a piece of string? It'll take as long as it takes.
📨 "I suggest you disable all the plugins and see if the site comes back to life, then reenable each one and see which one makes the site fall over. If that still doesn't fix it, I can have a look, but as I said, I will charge you."
✉️ "OK, I'll come back to you."
