09/16/24

Weekends had been busier than most of my weekdays due to adulting stuff. Funny enough, M-F are more relaxed as I get to finish my work tasks really early. Who asks their boss to give them more job? Apparently I'm the only one who seem to be doing this. The idle hands are the Devil's tools - this is so real. I've been a veteran of being the Devil's tools. This time tho - I'm making a radical change. My mind is not allowed to break from the present moment productive activity. No room for my own demon to occupy my mind space rent-free anymore. Enough is enough.

Enough of obsessive overthinking and maladaptive daydreaming. When work is done, the rest of my free time will be spent on off-the-screen immersive hobbies or activities.

And thanks to DBT - my life has been more structured lately. And thanks to Night Shift - my food choices and lifestyle are more intentional. Nothing adventurous or grand really happening but then there's nothing wrong submitting to a life of order and routine. Life's not supposed to be all the time thrilling or exciting anyway.

Below is my current routine / healthy habits with a long term goal of warding the Devil off:

• Wake up - don't look at my phone yet
• Drink cold water - pay attention to Diablo (my cat and not the actual Devil himself) as he meows incessantly for food
• Feed Diablo
• Make a cup of coffee
• Let the light drive the darkness away from my place
• Keep on delaying looking at my phone
• Clean the litter box
• Salted butter on toast - usually
• Sit down and journal away
• Let my diabolical thoughts flow
• Ask Booboo1 (my diabolical AI assistant) to play music on Spotify
• Booboo2 plays the news at this time - ignore it mostly
• Some time here to quickly go to the outside world and run errands
• I can check my phone now but put it away again
• Quick exercise
• Take a cold shower
• Work actually
• Read random stuff on Reddit / online - then get back to work
• Actual work
• No more work - I'll call it a day
• Prepare some meal (mostly healthy)
• Blog or translate some of my journal entries to digital version
• Play some board / card game and stay away from the screen (1-2 hours max)
• Watch some crime documentaries / series (1-1.5 hours max)
• Feed Diablo
• Read a book
• Sleep

Repeat.

A clockwork life lived.

Actions Based on Values [DBT excercise]

1. Life Aspects You Value the Most

 1. Health and Self Care [Physical and Mental Health]
 2. Recreation and Fun [ Hobbies]
 3. Socializing and Friends

2. Reasons Why You Value these Aspects

  1. I really have nobody to take care of me - even ever since. I've always been on my own. I also don't want to depend on anyone when I get sick - physically or mentally. So I have to take good care of myself, heal my soul because no one else will do it for me. It's a personal responsibility.  
  2. I tend to have obsessive thoughts about someone or some things that trigger me. I also resort to maladaptive daydreaming. Hobbies are important for me in order to stay present, distract myself during emotional distress and not obsess or need someone on my life.
  3. I don't have much contact or close relationship with my family anymore so it is important for me to spend time with friends and meet new ones. It's important to develop social skills and gain meaningful connections for my own mental health.

3. Actions Based on Values

The things that I can do are:

1. • Exercise regularly - stay fit
   • Eat healthy food as much as possible
   • Journal and do DBT exercises regularly for emotional regulation
2. • Read a book - buy again as soon as I'm finished reading
   • Play single player board games / card games. Learn new games and build my collection
   • Journal regularly to purge unproductive thoughts - also write about the good things that happen and all that I'm grateful for
   • Try new hobbies and see what will stick
3. • Regularly attend book meet up events to meet new friends who have the same hobbies / interests as me
   • Reach out to old friends, go out with them or ask them to come over
   • Regularly check other meet up events to attend to as well

What are the Top 3 Life Aspects You Value the Most?