Sometimes life changes in a single moment, and you don't even get a chance to prepare for it.
One day, my sister was there and then suddenly, she wasn't. Someone I did everything with, shared dreams with, laughed with, argued with, was suddenly gone.
What hurts the most is that we had plans for the future. I never imagined my future without her in it.
I didn't fully understand what losing her meant at first. I knew she had died, but accepting that I would never hear her voice again, hear her call my name again, and carry on without her was something else entirely.
Everyone says, "You have to be strong. Finish what you guys started." But that statement hurts a lot. I know they are trying to encourage me, but that's the most difficult thing I've ever had to do in my life.
Her death changed me.
I became quieter. The things that used to excite me no longer did. I started looking at life differently, and realised how little control we have over tomorrow. We make plans, postpone visits, conversations, and assume there will be another opportunity, but sometimes there isn't.
Some days, I'm doing okay, other days, I see myself drowning in grief once more. At some point, I became a shadow of myself.
I cried, prayed, talked about her, stayed silent, and simply allowed myself to feel whatever came. Eventually, I understood that grieving doesn't mean I have to stop living. I can miss her, cry, smile and stay hopeful.
I learnt forgiveness, not taking people for granted and appreciating loved ones while they are still alive. Sometimes we are so focused on tomorrow, whereas, tomorrow isn't promised.
Life is fragile. Learn to love, forgive and be happy.
Image Source: Gemini AI