🐔🏗️🍳 Hens 1 – Farmer 0: A Day So Full I Can Barely Remember It = My Actifit Report Card: October 1 2026
Yesterday was so packed that, as I write this, my brain is sending me a polite "error 404: day not found". I'm piecing it together from photographic evidence, muscle pain and a suspiciously empty egg tray. Let's reconstruct the crime scene. 👇
🚽➡️🏠 The compost toilet is becoming a tiny house
Construction of the compost toilet carried on, and I have to be honest: it increasingly looks like a tiny house. Roof, walls, personality... at this rate it'll ask for a mortgage, a doorbell and a view over the hills (it already has the view). 🏡😂
Not bad for a building whose only job is to deal with... well, you know. The most ambitious toilet in the Marche region is officially on its way to a housewarming party.
(No photo of the works yesterday: the builder was too busy building, and the photographer was too busy chasing hens.)
🐔🥬 Operation: Save the Winter Garden (again)
Now the real action. Our hens have developed a passion for digging up my winter vegetable garden. To them it's a luxury spa with free buffet; to me it's a slow-motion tragedy involving newly planted seedlings. 😭
I spent a large part of the day running after them, waving my arms like a very bad scarecrow, shouting words that are not in any farming manual. Here is the main suspect, caught red-handed (well, red-combed) right behind the beds:
Notice the innocent look. "Me? Dig? I was just checking the basil's structural integrity."
And her accomplice, the brown hen, who has perfected the art of looking at me as if I were the one trespassing:
Meanwhile, in the tall grass, another hen went for the intellectual option: surveying the territory next to our little watermelon. Yes, there is a watermelon in the first days of October. Hens, however, don't read calendars. 🍉
Final score: the hens run faster than me, they have no knee pain, and they have no shame. Lettuces: partially saved. My dignity: still pending.
🌿 Reeds: always useful in farming
In a short break from the chicken war, I went to gather some reeds (canne). On a farm they are always useful: supports for beans and tomatoes, windbreaks, little fences, plant stakes and shade, and, if the hens keep going, maybe also barriers against chickens. 😅
The car came back at sunset looking like a green dragon was riding along with me. If you see a car with a jungle sticking out of the back around Cagli, don't worry: it's just me, being "efficient".
🍳🔥 Dinner: the Super Omelette
After a day like that, a salad would have been an insult. So I made a super omelette with 6 eggs (courtesy of the same hens who destroy my garden: it's a complicated relationship, I know):
- 🧀 Parmigiano Reggiano
- ⚫ black pepper
- 💛 turmeric
- 🌶️ chili
- 🔥 smoked scamorza
Verdict: very filling! I'm not sure it was an omelette, or a meal with its own gravitational field. Eggs from the hens, revenge from the farmer. Justice is served, and it's delicious. 😋
So that was my day: tiny-house toilet, a hen chase, a car full of reeds and a 6-egg dinner. Not bad for someone who can't remember it. 😄
Your turn: what's the funniest (or most annoying) thing that animals have done to your garden? And do you have any good trick to convince hens that vegetables are for humans? Tell me in the comments! 👇
🌿 Matteo — Ca' Paradiso, Cagli (Marche, Italy) | www.caparadiso.com
🏃 Actifit Report
- Activities: walking, chasing hens (high intensity intervals), building, gathering reeds
- Steps: 8723
- Location: Cagli, Marche, Italy 🇮🇹
Post by @caparadiso from Ca' Paradiso farmhouse, Cagli (Marche).
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This report was published via Actifit app (Android | iOS). Check out the original version here on actifit.io