Meet my shorts. They're denim, and about 2 months old (though the label on them reads 'Forever 21').
They are shorter than any pair of shorts I have ever owned or worn before in my life!
I bought these right before leaving for my trip to California, and I remember staring at myself in the dressing room mirror. And it wasn't in admiration. All I could see were the jiggles in my thighs, and the cottage-cheese cellulite. I must have stood in that trial room for a solid 10 minutes, at war with myself. Could I possibly wear those in public? Was I kidding myself? Would people simply laugh at me or shake their heads in pity?
The shorts were comfortable. I was not.
After a serious battle with myself, I finally walked to the checkout counter and bought the shorts. The entire car ride home, I contemplated turning right back and returning them. Even when packing my suitcase for the trip, the shorts were among the last things to go in, because I wasn't sure I could do it.
Thankfully though, I wore them anyway, because it was crazy hot in California (and the Grand Canyon!). And you know what? NOBODY CARED! Not one person even gave my jiggly, dimpled thighs a second glance! And I can't begin to tell you how freeing that was. ✨
I ended up wearing the shorts EVERYWHERE! (Except San Francisco because OHMIGOD SO COLD! ❄) But even in Vegas, I strutted about, thighs firmly on display. 😎
And literally nobody bothered. No pointing & laughing, no staring in disgust, barely even a second glance (except for some Indian aunties there who insisted on looking at me as though I had angered all 50,000 of our Gods... but that's a different issue!)
But coming back to the point of this post. A lot of times, our 'problems' exist simply in our own minds. For those of us who deal with different manners of social anxiety, it feels like we're always in the spotlight, and that everyone is watching and judging us. And the truth is, few or no people are! Everybody has their own lives and their own issues, and they don't really have the time or the mindspace to really bother about anyone else's.
And well, even if there are a few people who truly are watching you and waiting for you to slip up, so what? Don't allow them to be more important in your life than they need to be. And yes, I know this is all easier said than done. Trust me, all of this so-called "wisdom" comes from years of dealing with my own issues, and realising that they're a lot less significant than I used to believe.
Your life, and your decisions, should be about you first. As long as you aren't wilfully hurting another being, do what you need to do to keep yourself happy. Don't let society, or the media, or even religion, dictate what you should be.
I hope you all find a pair of shorts (or a shirt, top, dress, whatever) that changes your life. 💞
