This experience that I’ve gone through is very hard for me to talk about, but hiding from it won’t make it go away. It’s done and I can’t go back, but maybe I can try to help someone else that has or is going through it but is afraid to tell anyone. Here lately a large topic on the news has been famous people doing sexual things to woman and men without their consent. I’m not going to discuss my thoughts on that issue at the moment, but how I’ve personally handled being sexually molested and raped by another woman (not going to name off names.) When I was very young I was staying with my grandma’s best friend and her grandkid’s so where I could go to church camp. This church was too far away from home, so I was going to stay with them for a month.
(This is the only photo I could find, but I was dressed up for a Halloween competition that they were holding at that church a year after I was mollested.)
In one room was two boys that were about 13 at the time and in the room next to them was me and another female who was quite a bit older then me. She would ask me very inappropriate questions, one of them was has anyone ever touched you down there. I told her no and that my parents always told me not to let others touch me down there. She told me that I can trust her, that she has something to show me. She said that she has something she wants to teach me, so I let her touch me. After she was done touching me she threatened me, saying that she would hurt my family if I told them about what she done to me. To this day I still blame myself, because why did I believe her? Why didn’t I stand up for myself and tell her no? Why would someone want to ruin a child’s innocence, that is still too young to understand what you’re doing to them? After her doing things to me for more than a week I remember sneaking off to the kitchen to sleep under the table because I was afriad she would threaten to hurt me. After dealing with it for two weeks I told my parents that I am homesick and that I want to come home. To this day I still haven’t told them. Not because I am afraid of her but the fact that after my grandmother passed away we stopped talking to them. To this day what she did to me still bothers me but as time passes the more I’ll heal. It has taught me one thing, just because they’re family or really close friends doesn’t mean they’re innocent, sometimes they can be the most dangerous. Whenever I have children I want to talk to them and say no matter what someone says to you, you can tell me or your father. If anyone touches you or talks about touching your private parts tell us. I don’t want my kids to go through what I have been through. Another thing if you have or are still going through being raped, sexually assaulted, molested.. etc feel free to talk to me. I consider every single one of y’all on here as my family!! I love y’all and please have a safe week!!