References are exceedingly important to connect a person. Not only reference but also appropriate reference should be used . Though this not happening in most cases. Think of us , do we always know the right time?
We do not use appropriate references more or else several times for manifold. Specially when it comes to women , we become more biased.
Something that we so very often hear whenever a reference is being made to a woman is just - what happened in her past or what did she wrongly do or about her relationship status or the color of her skin or by body shaming . Even by people belonging to the ‘educated’ class they do all these.Why do we have this sick tendency to reduce a woman’s identity to her past?
A woman whom got divorced; why do we consider her as which marital status she belonged? why do we think that this girl is bearing stigma as she is divorced? To get divorce thus the evidence of her being ‘bad character’?
What if she initiated divorce to escape an abusive husband who hit her regularly as 80% men in our country do.
or, for cruel in laws who treated her like a slave?
or, she wanted to pursue higher studies or a professional career but her husband/ in laws established that those were mutually exclusive with being a ‘good’ wife/mother?
or, she was married off as a child (as 52% girls in our country are) and realised that she never wanted such a life.
A divorce does not define a woman.If we as a society have an uncontrollable need to label people, then instead of incessantly branding divorced women as ‘divorcees’ how about we start labeling cruel in laws as barbarians and abusive husbands as wife beaters?
Economic independence, conscious awareness of one's rights, mutual respects are important factors.
In the past, you can see many examples where after divorce girl's were not well accepted in her parents family also. Instead of supporting, they demotivated their progeny. Though it wasn't supposed to happen.
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