The car stopped right next to me at the edge of the sidewalk. I was startled by the sound of squealing tires. Deep in my heart, I didn't want to know who stopped there and told my legs to walk on in a hurry. But as always, curiosity wins out, so I looked up anyway. At the sight of the face stepping out of the car, I stiffened. My knees began to buckle, my hands grew cold and my lips twitched.
He put his hands in his pants pockets as he came to stand in front of me. His face released no emotion as he looked deep into my eyes. I felt the butterflies to my stomach, my heart sank through my body, straight into my uterus and made more than ten heartbeats there in the blink of an eye.
'How are you?', I heard him say.
I wanted to answer, but the words stuck in my throat. Since he didn't get an answer, he sighed and lowered his head. For a moment, his gaze lingered on my sneakers. Then he looked up again. I saw tears in his eyes. Pain. Sadness. A dilemma. A battle he was fighting with his inner self. A battle between good and evil, between dream and reality, a battle between his brain and his heart.
'I'm leaving the Netherlands today.', he muttered.
For a small moment my breath stopped. I felt a stab of pain go right through my chest area.
'I will miss you.' , he continued.
I continued to stare at him. A tear escaped my eyes only to trace a wet streak down my cheek.
'Isn't there anything you want to tell me?', he asked.
I nodded. On a whim, I saw hope appear in his eyes. What was he expecting? Did he think I would stop him? That I would go hysterical now and collapse? Because that is what I wanted to do.
I sighed deeply before raising my right hand and placing it gently on his left cheek. I caressed his cheek with my thumb. He closed his eyes as if he wanted to capture this moment in his memory. I brought my face closer to his and very gently pressed a kiss to his lips. He opened his eyes again. Desire. Wasn't it amazing how our emotions always reflected in our eyes?
I quickly released him again and took a step back.
'I will always love you. Take care of yourself and good luck in moving forward.', I heard my trembling voice say. Look there again. His gaze full of desire immediately changed again to one full of pain. I could no longer see this. I couldn't bear these emotions.
'I think you should go now.', I muttered. He wanted to say something more. He wasn't ready to leave. But the shooting pain in my chest area was now becoming unbearable. I had to leave now! Right now! I zipped up my coat and turned around.
Thank you for reading. 馃挋