The Two Sides of Being Stubborn

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You have likely heard people describe someone as "stubborn"—someone who simply refuses to listen to others. Generally, this trait is viewed negatively in society. People often assume that a stubborn person is in the wrong, disrespectful, or dismissive of others' views; however, appearances can be deceiving, and every situation has multiple facets. A stubborn person stands firm in their convictions and does not easily yield to the opinions of others. You may have observed this in young children who stubbornly stick to their own terms—such as refusing to eat until they decide they are ready, regardless of how hard you try to feed them. Similarly, when a child takes a liking to something, they may insist on having it with such intensity that they might go to great lengths to get it.

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If we view stubbornness from a different perspective, it can often be a positive trait. There are situations where one must stand firm on one's stance because there is simply no other option. You may have observed people who remain completely unyielding in their resolve, regardless of how adverse the circumstances might be. This quality can be beneficial; achieving a goal often requires precisely this kind of stubborn determination—it is essential for success. Consider a Class 12 student aspiring to secure admission to a prestigious college: they might try for the first year without success and fail again the following year, yet remain steadfast in their resolve to qualify for the entrance exam and gain admission. While some people change their goals after facing minor setbacks, they would still have to work hard regardless of the goal; it is far better to persist with a single objective, no matter the obstacles or the time required. Such stubbornness is a positive trait, as it conveys a valuable message to society, demonstrating the kind of determination needed to become a better individual.

One negative aspect of stubbornness is that the individual becomes convinced of their own correctness; even when someone else points out a valid fact, the stubborn person remains fixated on their own view. As this habit takes root, the person begins to attach excessive importance to their own opinions, giving rise to arrogance—a trait that can eventually become detrimental to them. No one truly likes an arrogant person, regardless of how powerful they are or how high a position they hold; while people may show them feigned respect to their face, in reality, they are not genuinely liked, and consequently, their relationships tend to dwindle.

If we consider both aspects of stubbornness, the positive side is something an individual should possess; after all, accomplishing any task requires motivation, and that motivation arises only when one has the determination—or stubborn resolve—to see it through. Such stubbornness is essential because, without it, a person might eventually lose sight of their objective and drift off course. This resolve prevents one from straying and compels one to remain focused on the goal.

From a negative perspective, one should not be so stubborn as to insist that only one's own view is correct while dismissing the other person's words as wrong. If this habit persists, it eventually hardens into arrogance—a belief that "I alone am right, and no one else is." Consequently, the person becomes unable to acknowledge their own errors, convinced that they simply cannot be wrong. Everyone should know how to admit their mistakes; furthermore, one should always listen to others—regardless of whether they are older or younger—try to understand their point of view, and then respond accordingly.

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