In my mind no.05 Why we don't search for help [#23]



You are reading another post in a series related to mental health.
The day before yesterday I wrote about the most common reason for depression and why love is not a good solution to sadness.

Today about why we are not looking for help when needed.

  • Complicated questions, preface

The answer may vary from person to person.
It is even harder to answer in deeper analysis.
It turns out that all of the the answers make up the truth.

Why do we walk with depression, traumas, and a sick interior?
It's like a ten-kilo sack of potatoes. You put them on your back and in a hunched position, you shuffle your whole life with a burden.

There is a third level of insightful guesswork on complex questions,
that I won't need today.

Looking from the meta perspective, it turns out that the seemingly contradicting yes and no answers can be true at the same time. In the future, I will write about how to see the world from a broader perspective.

Returning to the merits:
I will write down only two perspectives - chemical and psychological.

  • Chemestry in the brain

People under the influence of various disorders, emotions, feelings and diseases have different hormonal balance.

The picture presents the problem based on the research entitled "Dopaminergic modulation of decision making and subjective well-being," published in Journal of Neuroscience.

I will start with the results of another, for me immoral research.

They turned off the natural ability of dopamine production in the mice.
It turned out that the poor animals did not move for days, lying still. Ultimately, they died of hunger or thirst despite having a water / food under their noses.

Likewise, a person with low dopamine levels is very limited in their ability to act. So it is easy to understand a mess in a room and unwashed dishes - which makes this condition even worse. Tidy room, tidy mind

Ironically, because as I said in the meditation post:
Doing simple activities stimulates the production of dopamine.

Laziness does not exist, but there is powerlessness, lack of will, or psychological blockages.

Every time my psyche hit the ground, only one thing could help me. I would turn on my favorite energetic music on loud, rolled up my sleeves and cleaned the apartment. As if I fell into a berserk trance where nothing mattered. Only intensive and meticulous cleaning.
So sweat it out! Gym, gardening, long walk, sports, sauna.

In future posts, I will write about self-awareness of hormone production.

Forgive yourself for lack of strength!

There is nothing worse than reproaching yourself when you are helpless.
Most of the depression I felt disgusted with My passivity.
Society kept telling me that I was lazy, that I was a failure.
No wonder my thoughts parroted in my head, like they had a megaphone.

All disturbances are caused by civilization distortions.
Our brains are not adapted to the world we have created. I don't know what you are going through or how these things affect your balance of happiness hormones. ➡️ I know it's not your fault. ⬅️
Feel into this sentence, cry and let go of the feeling, tears heal.
Please say it out loud It is not my foult.

  • Psychology of delaying searching for help

People tend to think that health problems are not equal to mental problems.
The truth is, that psychologist, psychotherapist or psychiatrist is no different from a family doctor, dentist or surgeon.
Physical illness = mental illness.
If you have flu = go to a specialist.
If you have heavy thoughts = go to a specialist.

I did not follow this advice myself.
Sometimes I thought that I was fine, I can do it because I'm tough, I can handle it. All in all, I was right in my own way, but it is not a good solution to struggle alone for 8 years.

I only had a few visits to psychologists, twice to a psychiatrist.
I suppose I got it wrong, or the understanding of psychology was too low at the time. If your visit fails you, don't give up!
I recommend group therapies the most. We are herd animals and even when we are afraid of other people, being in such a community heals.
You're not alone!

People mistakenly identify themselves with their thoughts.
If I hear voice in my head, it must be me, right?No.
I posted about it in the post monkey mind.

You are pure love hiding somewhere deep inside.
The inner child, amid fear, sadness and not knowing how to get out.
Help him!

A Monkey that is always afraid of change.
'A Monkey' is a association referring to previous posts.
Our subconscious mind prefers to stay in the swamp it knows,
than to exit and risk the unknown. It is easier for him be stuck in the well-known, sizzling desert, than to risk entering the jungle.

Immediately after making the appointment to the specialist,
or on the day of the meeting, you can feel fear, panic.
This is the Monkey that is afraid of the new. Trust fate and go.
You can visualize yourself in your head as you enter and talk.
It will make it easier for You. A good specialist will know how to guide you.

You are on this earth not only to suffer.

I don't believe things could change.
That's what I thought, all My depression.
I understand it, if you feel like that.
Let me put it briefly - you are very wrong, just as I was wrong.

You are needed, you are valuable, you deserve a new life.
For a diamond to be created, you need carbon and very high pressure.
The pain you are experiencing is pressure;
The pain you experience ennobles you;
The pain you experience is the power to heal,
that will make room for your new life.

You are just getting prepared to become a diamond.

I believe in You,
read Ya!


The main reason why I started this blog is to tell my story.
I've grown a lot thru my lifetime and learned things I believe should be taught in primary school, as a human right.
Teachings about basic human needs, self-discovery, search for passion, cooperation, need of tribe, love, how to grow, healthy lifestyle for both physical and mental health.
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