Hello everyone 👋 This is my first time submitting an entry for this community's weekly contest! Before getting into it, however, I would like to add a warning: this entry will deal with many sensitive topics, including mentions of drugs and domestic abuse.
When I reflect on the situation I was in 2 years ago, I think back on the fact that nobody, not even my family, knew the true extent of the danger I was in. It was the most traumatic experience of my life; however, if I had not gone through it, I would not be where I am today.
It was a toxic relationship before it had even began. I lost my closest friend over him. He was virtually cheating not but 3 months after we had started dating. As time went on, we became addicted to drugs, and he began to verbally abuse me for my money. Not but a little over a year since he and I had been together, I finally gathered up the strength to leave, and even started seeing someone whose company I truly enjoyed... However, shortly afterwards, my boyfriend was begging for me to take him back, assuring me he would become a changed man... and I naively believed him.
I cut ties with the man that I was starting to fall in love with, a decision I immediately regretted. My boyfriend argued that moving away from our hometown would be good for us: we could start fresh, get away from drugs, live somewhere we actually wanted to be... So, we decided to move out to the west end of the country.
However, have you often heard the expression, "your problems have a funny way of finding you"? That saying immediately came true for us. We left our home without so much as a plan, a destination. We were living out of a car for months, eating crappy food, exhausted, fighting all the time... To top it off, I could not stop revisiting my regretful decision in my mind. I honestly began to believe that I had made the wrong choice, that I had given up a chance at happiness for a miserable relationship... again.
After about 2 months of living out of a car, we finally settled on a province to live in, and even found a place to stay. Our relationship began to improve; I truly was committed to giving us a second chance. However, we quickly became bored, and yet another one of our problems found us: drugs. As our relationship started to crumble once again, another problem--a more recent one, this time--began to emerge: there was no longer any trust in the relationship, due to my heartache for my romance back home. My boyfriend believed that I could not truly love him due to my feelings for someone else, and even believed that I was cheating on him. His paranoia began to escalate, as did the verbal abuse...
One night, during an accusation of cheating, my boyfriend slapped me across the face. As I got angry and began to defend myself, he put me in a choke hold. My initial anger wouldn't let me recognize the severity of the situation I was in, until instead of being greeted by air when I went to inhale, I was greeted by dry pain. Seconds passed. My fingers started clawing at his arms in an attempt to break him off. My vision was starting to go black... Finally, he let me go. I immediately called the police, who left him alone, and drove me to a women's shelter that was right down the street.
I had quite a bit of time to do some reflection while I was at that shelter. I also had the opportunity to talk to many different women while I was there. Some women were in similar situations as myself. Other women were going through greater battles. One woman even went missing while she was staying at the shelter with me... I quickly realized I did not want to continue to put myself through that life; I did not want to become another statistic.
Within a week or so, I had devised my plan. With no one knowing that I was at a shelter, and no one even knowing that I was coming back home, I quietly packed up my stuff, left my boyfriend for good, and began to make the 3,000 KM drive back home.
Today, I am happy to report that I am in a much better place now. I cut all ties with my ex-boyfriend. I quit drugs cold turkey, and have been clean for a year and a half. I went back home and reconnected with the man I was seeing; he and I are now officially together. And, we also have a 5 month old baby girl together, named Kiva 💚
