I am not sure I was trying to give you a reality check!
There is a terrific book by Derren Brown called "Happy":
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30142270-happy
He rallies against blinkered positive thinking, and encourages the reader to really consider the concept of happiness. It's a good read, and I would really recommend that anyone gives it a go. I think you might really like it.
RE: I am STRUGGLING Lately. A LOT. I Feel Like I'm Underwater