There is a song making waves lately in my country titled "Adulthood na scam". Once you become an adult, people set a lot of expectations for you. They expect you to stand up and take charge. Everyone understands this but no one expects the challenges that comes with it.
After graduating from college, I moved to Portharcourt where I got a teaching job. I was there for six months before I got a Federal Government job that needed me to report at Asaba, Delta state. My maternal Aunt lives in Asaba. I believed accomodation wouldn't be an issue. The plan was to live with her for the period of my six months training before my induction. The training required I left the house as early as 5:30am. Everyday I went to work without eating and go to bed at night without eating. This was because my aunt didn't care if I ate or not. She doesn't make breakfast early and wouldn't allow me make any before leaving for work neither does she make dinner early. Infact, she only remembers it's time to make dinner each time I stroll into the house, tired and exhausted from standing under the sun all day. By the time she's done, I'm too exhausted to eat and so I just hit the bed.
This continued for a week and some days. She never cared how I was surviving without money since it's a new job and no salary has been paid. All she cared about was that I was endangering her family by leaving so early in the morning. She had this conversation with one of her elder sisters unknown to her that my brother eavesdropped and informed me. She also went ahead to complain that since the stranger( I) came to live with them, her husband stopped eating her food and sleeping with her which was a blatant lie. I was so bittered. All I got from that phone call was that she wanted me to leave. I thought of what to do and who to go to.
I was new in town and I knew no one. I went to church instead and shared my story. An old man and his wife offered to take me in. They sent someone to pick me up from my aunty's house and bring me to their house. This family took me in and showered me with so much love. Till date, a lot of people still believe I am one of their daughters. I lived with them for almost a year and not for once, did I have any reasons to complain. I've never seen such kindness and compassion shown to anyone who isn't family.
Looking back at these events, I learnt a lot of lessons that shaped me into the woman I am today.
I do not expect things to always go smoothly. The dynamics is what makes life interesting. No one owes me anything. I learnt to make my way in life.
Life threw lemons at me and I made lemonade out of it. I didn't allow what I was going through to weigh me down or stop me from pursuing my goal. I remained focused. I accepted the challenges and I found a way out myself. No matter the challenges I may have in the future, I believe I will always figure things out.
When I learnt of what my aunty taught of me and how she implied I was destroying her family, I felt helpless. I told her something before I left. I said, "You and I are family. We fight and make up but if your husband leaves you today because of me, he may never come back and I do not want to have that on my conscience". Yes it seemed at that time that I may end up on the streets but I didn't. A solution came in the form of a better home. This taught me to always focus my time and energy on finding a solution whenever problem comes my way and to never be afraid to ask for help.
This family took me in and helped me with everything I needed to make my stay worthwhile without knowing me. I wasn't a family member neither was I a friend. I was a total stranger. This taught me that any little help I render can transform the world of another person. I do not hesitate to reach out and help as much as I can whenever the need arises.
This is the belief I have and share. Sometimes, those you think are family and would be there for you would fail you. If your family rejects you, don't fret, just know that the right people will come into your life and they would become your new family.
I wish I can go on and on. Learning is a constant process and life is full of so many new lessons to learn. For one to grow and become a better person, one needs to keep evolving with life.
images designed on canva
This is my entry into Hive Learner's weekly writing contest
