Positive thinking, or Breaking the transmission chain

All my life I have not been interested in psychology. Until recently. So, correct me if I'm wrong. But for my opinion, the person who sought the assistance of a psychologist hears most often a phrase like this: "The cause of your problem lies in your relationship with your mother / father".

And what about your mother/father? Was their problem also born in relationships with their parents? And where is the start and the end of this chain?

My granny, mother's mom, had an extremely hard life. As a result, her mind was full of complexes, superstitions and blocking programs. Unintentionally, she gave all that accumulation to her daughter, i.e. my mom. In addition, she had her own bad life experience, and her consciousness saved all that. Both of them just tried to survive...

In my childhood and youth I used to hear "no" and "not". And I've noticed some interesting things only a couple of years ago. When my mom want to know, for example, if I have done something, she don't say:
"Did you do something?"

Almost never. In 95% of cases shs says:

"Didn't you do something?"

From a glance, the difference is not important. But this example is ... like a motto of whole her life. She's always tuned to worst. And after all, the difference is tremendous.

My friends know about the difficulties I have in communication with my mother. Many of them told me: "With passing years you'll be the same". That sentence made me mad, and I tried my best to be a quite different mom for my daughter. But I couldn't break that chain, all by myself.

A few years ago my time has come, and now my work on myself is more meaningful and (hopefully) efficient. To break daily programming from different people like "it's impossible", "it has to be earned", "life is pain", "not your day" etc. My life has handed me good opportunities not once, but I didn't use them, just because of my hesitation. I didn't believe something good can happen to me without prior suffering and overcoming obstacles. I think it is what my mom feels as well...

I am not a psychologist, but I keep gently confront those things in my mother, even if she doesn't ask for, I do it not only for her, but for me and my daughter, as they live together. The more I change my way of thinking, the more I got upset of her inability to enjoy anything, even simple daily things. I love her and want to see her happy, she really deserves it. Although... who don't?

There is nothing immodest to say "I'm doing great" instead of "Not too bad". And I am ready to it may be a long way.

This post is inspired by my mother's recent visit. And by this picture as well )) Although it doesn't mean exactly what I told about.

Anyway, positive thinking is very important, and I believe that it can change one's life. I'll be happy if my post will find someone to make a pause and think.

By the way, what do you think about the picture? Is it true for you?