boy whispers to his mom during a wedding
boy: “Mommy?”
mom: “What?”
boy: “Why is the girl dressed in white?”
mom: “Because this is the happiest day of her life.”
boy: “… so why is the boy dressed in black?”
Q: What did Jay-Z call his girlfriend before they got married?
A: Feyoncé!!
I told my dad to embrace his mistakes. He cried. Then he hugged my sister & me.
I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.
Daughter: Mom, I’m pregnant!
Mom: I thought I told you when a guy touches your boobs, say don’t, and when he touches you vagina, say stop.
Daughter: But he kept touching both, so it came out,”don’t, stop, don’t, stop.
Never ask for the ‘High Five’ from a short person, you can ask for a ‘Low Five’!
It was the end of the school year and Joey’s mother asked: “And were the exam questions difficult?” “They weren’t
bad at all,” her son replied. “It was the answers that gave me all the trouble.”
Q: What did one butt cheek say to the other? A: Together, we can stop this sh*t.
Dad: Shame on you, Peter. Why did you hit your little sister?
Peter: Well, Daddy, we were playing Adam and Eve with the apple and all. Well, instead of tempting me with that
apple, she ate the thing herself!
Fastest mode of communication – Tell a girl a rumor and take a promise to keep it a secret.
Boy texts his Girl “Honey, I can’t live without you! When will you come to me? “Here is the KILLING Reply -“Who is
dying! I lost my saved numbers, kindly tell me your name?”
My teacher pointed at me with her ruler and said that at the end of this ruler is a dumb. I got a detention after asking
which end!
Just changed my Facebook name to ‘No one’ so when I see stupid posts I can click like and it will say ‘No one likes
this’.
My mom never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
Never argue with a fool, they will lower you to their level, and then beat you with experience.
