Did you know that your expectations can influence others?
Image credit: Pixabay.com.
Let's start with a bit of history. In Greek mythology, it is said that a king and sculptor named Pygmalion had the ideal of the perfect woman he wanted for himself.
However, tired of searching and searching he sculpted Galatea, he saw her so beautiful and perfect that he fell madly in love with her, to the point that he kissed her, dressed her and even thought that his statue had life. His love was so great that he begged Aphrodite, goddess of love, to give her life and thus be reciprocated. It so happened that one day when he kissed Galatea, he saw his wish come true and the statue came to life. Pygmalion married Galatea, and from their union a daughter named Paphos was born.
What is the significance of this story? In the field of psychology, it was relevant when Rosenthal and Jacobson, two psychologists conducted a study to investigate the so-called Pygmalion effect. In brief, the study consisted of working with two groups of students, one considered as high achievers and the other as low achievers. The teacher in charge, however, had the information reversed. Over time it was observed that the first group began to lower their grades while the other group improved. Why did the second group improve? This result was a product of the expectations that the teacher created for himself and acted so that they would be fulfilled, in this way his attitude, his way of teaching them was different and special.
Hence the conclusion that the expectations and beliefs that a person has will influence the behavior and results of another person, positively or negatively.
Since we were little, we have been influenced by our parents, teachers, classmates and friends, so much so that sometimes the concept we have of ourselves has been created in part by the image that others have, and many people are what others expect them to be. Of course, this can affect us both personally and in different areas such as work, social and family.
So, having knowledge of how the Pygmalion effect works in our lives will allow us to be more aware of how we influence others and ourselves with our beliefs and expectations.
Now, let's analyze the Pygmalion effect in our lives
We must pay attention to what we believe, because it directly influences our reality. If you believe that you will not be able to achieve something in your life, it will not happen. And it is not only a matter of thought but also of action, since when a person thinks that something will not happen, he/she does nothing to make it happen. If the person believes that it is going to work, he/she keeps his/her positive expectations about what is going to happen and remains firm until he/she gets what he/she is looking for. Interestingly, when the expectations come from the person to himself, it is known as the Galatea effect.
Image credit: pixabay.com.
If we are people who focus only on the mistakes and failures of others, that image we have will only make us feel angry, and we only expect the worst, because our expectations are negative. On the other hand, if we focus on thinking about the good in the people we interact with and focus our attention on positive images, we will express the best of ourselves and our relationships will be healthier.
Another important point is that many parents see themselves reflected in their children and want them to be like them, or send them messages that are not very positive or motivating. To avoid the negative effects of the Pygmalion effect, it is essential that parents have realistic expectations, taking into consideration that sometimes what we have in reality does not turn out to be exactly what we would have liked. Thus, by recognizing and accepting others for what they are, their abilities will help them to improve their self-esteem and maintain a good attitude in life. Finally, respect that our children have the freedom to have their own aspirations and not feel pressured. We must take care of the way we talk to our children because with one word we can empower or limit them.
That is why I invite you to think about the way you express yourself, how you make your comments, as well as the attitude you have towards yourself and others.
See you next time!