Confidentiality Yes or Not? - Week #153

Keeping secrets is not easy because secrets can torment you, not simply that the secret is yours, but it can be anyone else's, hell and if it is a secret that involves another person and can affect someone you know is even worse, the secret itself just for knowing it generates remorse of conscience to those who care, because others do not give a damn.

When a person tells us a secret of his life it means that he trusts us and as such we must keep what that person has entrusted to us, besides, if it were the other way around we would not like anyone to divulge that secret either, because it belongs to us.

I believe that to trust a secret there must be a lot of confidence, for my part I do not tell my secrets to everyone but I have two trusted people with whom I know I can count and I know they will not say anything, for my part I will not say anything when someone entrusts me with a secret because I learned not to do it and I say I learned because years ago I went through something that taught me that it is better not to say anything.

When I was about fifteen years old, a cousin and I were very close friends and we told each other many intimate things, she was older than me by three years, one day she told me a secret that she was going to run away with a boyfriend she had, I loved my cousin and I didn't want her to make a mistake that she later regretted, So I told my mother and she in turn told my cousin's father because she didn't have a mother, that process was horrible because my cousin hated me for many years, we didn't talk and she even did things to me afterwards, I didn't really do it out of malice, I just felt that she was making a big mistake.

Eventually about three or four years later she got married and it was good to see her in her wedding dress, I know I was wrong to say what she had told me; however if you ask me if I were to go back to that moment I would do it again for her, for me it was not a mistake, it was something positive.

Today she and I talk to each other normally, everything happened and the grudge was left behind, the subject was never touched again and we are happy.

Now I understand that it was something of girls, teenagers, maturity leads us to think other things with my friends confidants is different we are adults a secret I know is harmful to another person, I think I would talk a lot with the person who has told me the secret and try to persuade her, on the other hand I don't think that will happen because I don't have friends like that who are capable of destroying their lives or other people's lives, but I also understand that confidentiality is important and if we have to take the secret to the grave that's the way it will be.