I have a ritual every Saturday now, I wake up and think I have to go and visit the shed, its needs sorting, It's the essential duology of the Saturday man, one wants to get up and be productive and do stuff, like the gym, or a walk or read a book until it’s time to go and do the Saturday stuff.
The other is the lazy feckless rascal Saturday guy, he enjoyed a drink last night, or maybe a few drinks and now wants to sleep till noon then get up and watch the new episodes of attack on titan and just generally loaf and laze about.
I like feckless Saturday guy...
So somewhere in between I get up and face the walk to the dread shed
It’s about this point that like an attention deficient spaniel start looking around at anything to take my mind off the dread shed and can hare off and do anything else.
Is that a plane? Hang on, I know about chemtrails
Ooft, maybe this such a good idea feckless Saturday guy whispers, maybe we should go and do something else, attack on titan maybe?
No, be strong, face the fear, do the work, it’s not like it's a dark satanic mill you are entering, get on with it.
I think I have been here before, the padlock hasn’t been locked, was I here before? God my memory it all feels strangely familiar
I peek in,
It's as bad as I remember, oh the horror
Everywhere I look, the strange weeds growing in
The tidy shelves I got to put things away,
Hang on! That’s where all the tools went, scattered around the tool box I got to organise them,
Hang on, is that some feckin trying to get in through the window Triffids.
That way looks like freedom and escape from the most boring annoying Saturday ever,
I'm doing an Indiana Jones and getting outta here...
I close the door, but don’t lock the padlock, ah that’s it, I think I lost the key, I’ll leave it unlocked.
I'll do it next Saturday, I really will clear the shed next Saturday, definitely...
