Letting go wasn’t easy but it was worth it. You know sometimes in life when you look around and realize that you are carrying too much of everything, too much pain, too many memories, and people who had hurt you deeply, that was me for a long time. I didn’t notice at first, but over the years, I had packed so many heavy things into my heart, old wounds, unforgiveness, and relationships that quietly broke me down.
I used to hold on to people, even when they hurt me, I kept forgiving without really healing, hoping things would change, hoping they would see my worth. I also kept holding on to the past, things people said, how they treated me, how they made me feel less than. I didn’t know how to let go, in some way, it felt like if I forgave them, I was saying what they did was okay, but deep down, I knew I was only hurting myself by carrying all that anger and sadness.
There was a particular friendship that changed me, I gave so much of myself, my time, my energy, my care, but in return, I got silence, distance, and empty promises. I tried to make excuses for them. I told myself maybe I was the problem, but the truth was, I was just trying to hold together something that had already fallen apart. Letting go of that friendship was one of the hardest things I’ve done, it felt like I was losing a piece of myself but deep down, I knew staying meant losing even more.
Forgiving the people who hurt me was not easy either, some never even said sorry, some did not even know how deeply they affected me, I used to replay their words over and over in my mind, trying to make sense of it all. But one day, I realized I didn’t want to carry it anymore, I was tired of being angry, I was tired of feeling stuck in the past. So, I made the decision to forgive, not for them, but for me. So I could breathe, so I could finally move forward.
I forgave everyone even those who never apologized, I let myself stop overthinking every little thing, I walked away from relationships that drained my inner peace.it did not happen all at once, It was slow. Some days, I cried, some days, I wanted to go back but I kept going and in letting go, I started to feel free.
I also had to forgive myself for staying too long in places I should have left, for not standing up for myself sooner, for trusting people who didn’t deserve it. That part was even harder. But it was also the most freeing.
Letting go changed me, it hurt like hell at first but slowly I started finding joy and inner peace. I started loving myself more, I stopped blaming myself for other people’s actions, I began to protect my peace without feeling guilty.
The truth is, not everything or everyone is meant to stay and that’s okay. I’ve heard this quote severally “Walking away from what hurts does not make you weak, it means you’re strong enough to choose yourself”. Looking back now, I don’t regret the things I left behind. They were part of my story, but they don’t define who I am now.
I’m still healing, I’m still learning, but I’m lighter and for the first time in a long time, I feel free.
