All artwork is unfinished
Had a lazy day today. I worked a little of course, but not that much. Mostly because my laptop's battery died. I didn't walk around too much outside. I ended up pacing around my room. I felt just pretty bored and didn't know what to do. Ended up drawing a lot and working on my drawing a human body from imagination abilities. I've always been able to draw figures from looking at them, but have never been able to do good human figures from imagination. It's like I forget everything. The other thing I've always lacked is even imagining what pose I "want". The thing is my mind very very rarely "sees" what I'm going to draw before I draw it. I just start doodling and drawing and creating and watch as something takes shape. I can think well I'll draw a tree, or I'll draw a head, but I never think of the specific image.
I haven't sold anything on amazon merch recently, and sadly I ended up getting a tote bag returned. So I've currently made negative money on Amazon since it will take the money out of what I've already sold. I guess they just end up throwing away the returned product. That's awful to think about, I wonder how much trash has been created by throwing away these print on demand products that are returned?
I paced around my room at the end of the day. I didn't hit the gym and I didn't
It rained earlier. Only rained a little, maybe about ten - fifteen minutes, but it was nice. I miss the rain. I miss Seattle a lot recently. I wish my parents lived near there. When I go back to USA in a week I'll be headed back to my parents house in South Carolina and I really don't like it there. I wish there was somewhere in South East Asia like Seattle. Best vibe I've found in Thailand was Chiang Mai, but it's still hot and sunny. Just not the same. But maybe what I really also miss is yearning for the past. I miss what my life had been, even though I was suicidal back then, I still felt like I had time to get the life I wanted. Now I'm older and the possibilites are shut off from me. I wish I had realized I was autistic back then. I would have been able to get myself ... perhaps, to a place of understanding. I still really felt lonely back then. I would have struggled with attempting to meet people still. Online dating wasn't what it is now. I just have to keep plugging away at these online ventures, print on demand and creating art to keep myself sane.
This report was published via Actifit app (Android | iOS). Check out the original version here on actifit.io