Have you ever wondered to yourself in the heat of the moment "Why can't this person just get it already?!" Or "How many times do I have to keep fighting this battle with them?
I sure have. In times like that I often feel discouraged, helpless, and in a way, stuck. I feel like I'm stuck in this rut, and the person I am arguing with won't let me out! It can definitely be frustrating, but over time, Christ is teaching me that these arguments are ultimately making me a better person.
Here are a few tips I have been trying to apply:
#1) Its very possible you are WRONG.
I am learning that while my opinion may differ from that of the person I am arguing with, it doesn't mean their opinion is any less significant than mine. In fact it doesn't even mean mine is correct!
#2) Always keep an open mind about things.
Even if you are 99.99% sure, you can't be certain you are right. When a person sees you with an open mind, listening, and considering their thoughts, they will often times feel more comfortable, less defensive, and in the end more open to resolving the issue, rather than just defending their opinions.
#3) Do NOT cop out of arguments.
(This is a big one)
I used to do this simply because I didn't want to argue anymore. And I have learned that is a very bad idea. I know it's sad I had to learn this, since it should be common knowledge, but I am a naturally passive person, and confrontation makes me very uncomfortable. Therefore the easiest way out of that dreadful argument would be to just agree with whatever the heck they are spewing at the moment.
It's stupid I know, but what can I say, I am not perfect. However, this is something that I have worked on and learned from. Giving up, and agreeing, actually made things so much worse because anytime you agree to something that you don't actually agree with, you are setting yourself up to look like more of an idiot than you are. This is because, you are probably contradicting the things you've been fighting for so passionately, just moments before you gave up, and started saying yes to everything.
Needless to say this is a horrible way to argue.
DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME!
There are a multitude of things I have learned and am learning, but we will save that for later. My hope is that you will read this, and maybe the next time you are faced with confrontation you will try these little tricks, and see if they work for you. Maybe they won't... Who knows, maybe your problem is that you never back down from a fight, even when you should. In that case, read this with the other person in mind. Either way, I wish you happy arguments! (If there is such a thing haha)
