Most times our health gets overwhelmed by things happening around us. I personally have experienced fears that went down my spine because of the life I chose for myself. The things that scare me ain't about life or death. Because to me life is not worth living if it's not fully expressed.
Last weekend I strolled out of my street. To catch some fresh air in the evening, I felt like waters were over my head, as if life was choking. Not because they were things beyond my control, it's not that same feeling you have when life is throwing things at you. It was rather a feeling of inadequacy, a feeling of not being enough. A feeling that equated to fear; the fear that time is running so fast, life is rather going at a pace that seemed too quick and I kept wondering if I'm enough, if I had what it takes to pull through. If I'm ever gonna be able to accomplish the goals I'd set for myself.
Someone ones told me that he read in a book that dreams are not what we see in sleep, but the things that keep us awake from sleeping. One major problem I've always had is having to over think things, not because I lacked the capacity to execute but because I'm often scared of the life I'll have if I didn't do anything at all, and then I'm also scared of the outcome if I execute wrongly or what if it doesn't go through as plan, what if it doesn't go through at all, what if it doesn't work out.
One bad thing about self doubt is that you don't even give yourself a chance. Something just keep telling you that you aren't good yet, you still need to work harder to be able to scale through. Of course that's true, but the main aim is not to make you better, if it was you would just commit to whatever you're working on and learn in the process.
Self doubt can lead to procrastination, making you to do things at the last minute when things are almost getting out of hand or when you stand to be penalised if didn't do do it.
This is me talking about my own fears, not as though I have overcome all of it; I guess in life we still need some level of fear, not to keep us tamed but rather help us take caution. I always make sure to remind myself that I don't need to be perfect before I start. While I try my best to be prepared, I can also learn along the way.
I may not have figured out everything about life yet, but with hard work and consistency, my chances of hitting my goals are higher.
Although environment and opportunity can be a great determinant in life pursuits, it's better when opportunity meets preparedness. I believe that is what luck is about, maybe not exactly but something similar.
The fear of not ever hitting your goals can be so disheartening, especially when situations surrounding you are suggesting the same.
But as a man/woman sometimes it is important to
Count your previous victories, even if it was difficult to push through difficult times before, the fact that you're alive and reading this post signifies hope.
Just start working on the project already. First you should know that you're the biggest project you can ever work on. And when you get the 'you' project figured out, you're almost figuring out life itself.
I know it's easier said than done, that's why you must start because that's the only way to get a result.
In doing we become
Don't be too hard on yourself, work on the most important things, one step at a time. I believe this life is for us and not against us, especially if we have the mind of making it a better place.
Quit the self doubt, quit procrastinating, and start already.. just like I'm doing today.
All pictures are mine, taken with my phone when relaxing during my evening walk
