not sure if i've processed it or not yet really but i wanted to write a little something to make sure that there was an immutable blockchain ledger post somewhere out there in the ether for my old friend robin beckett, aka subwolf.
he passed away recently, i'm not sure what happened as it's not been posted about but i know he lost his mother over the course of this pandemic. I'm sure that was hard for him, he had been in touch a few times but i just ghosted you. i'm sorry about that.
I guess i was'nt the happy go lucky dude that you knew all those years back when we met on the helpdesk, geeking out to new ARM tech, talking about music collections, hybrid, dNB and all kinds of things really, taking ya to ya first LAN party maybe? first drugs, not sure.
Different chapter in my life, but regardless i saw you as a friend, you were always kind to me and i learned a bunch from you and visa versa i'm sure. visiting over christmas that time and finding out my gran had died at home, you were always a solid dude, gave me a beer and then back flipped on the floor like a darn tornado hit -- we had some laughs.
always quick to share a "bass face" as we tried to find tracks that would rock your car stereo or just share media with each other, videos, web stuff we were into -- i think if i had been that side of the pond who knows what we would have built, maybe we would have a startup or two together, i'd like to think we did -- maybe now, where you are, you did.
I don't think i ever really processed the time when you had your stroke, when i got that phone call in the early morning, i was shell shocked, i could not process it, i'm not even sure who phoned me but i'm glad that person did, it might have been your mum.
I know i was not prepared for the years you went through of treatments and such like, i remember getting in touch here and there but that must have been a hard time, relearning everything, your speech etc, if it was'nt for the sysops/chat rooms finding you maybe that would have gone a different way early on.
then the mini crash with dad on the freeway, well that led to that situation right, dayum you had a lot to process, especially with melissa and baby and all that stuff you had to go through, trying to make ends meet, trying to make it work. i felt for ya man, i really did.
Being the only two sysops in our little town was a bit of a trip back then huh? 68000 people and us two are the ones running bulletin board systems eh. you introduced me to fidonet and eventually i'd discover the www, the world wide web and i was hooked -- as soon as i saw napster that was game over for me.
My life was P2P forever from that point onwards, i'm gonna try and do my best to make sure that if i road trip across america that i call in and see daughter, buy her a meal and tell her all about you, share some photos and videos with her maybe so she remembers what a top guy you was, because you was my good friend.
To soon dude, really, you had a lot more to give yet but i understand it must have been difficult what with the loss of your mom. I wish i could have been a better friend there in the end, i'm sorry i fucked that up, i should have connected more, we all have our own demons thou right?
i'll leave you with this my good friend, subby...
We had some laughs thou eh?
I'll never forget all the memories.
Cheers,
You Good Friend,
dmouse,
(ps. we got HELLA drunk on that watermelon)
