It is late Saturday night, the girls are asleep and I have a glass of nice wine from near where I grew up sitting by my side. A perfect time to dream. Dreams are important, the only valuable part of sleeping experience - yet life demands that we wake up and see the world for what it is and act accordingly.
We went for lunch today and to find a surprise for my daughter, as she has been home ill all week while we have been working and has been an absolute trooper, largely taking care of herself for several hours a day. I don't know of many kids that could do the same, without sitting in front of a TV for the majority of it.
She was concerned about the surprise though, as she new that we hadn't chosen anything yet, but she really wanted it to be a surprise. The concern was, "how could we surprise her if she is with us at the time?"
As we drove I was talking to my wife about various crypto things, as it is currently in a precarious position and she doesn't really understand what is going on with it all. The main thing I was trying to explain to her though was, how important it is for me to be able to feel that we are somewhat secure and how financial concerns have always been the largest stressor in my life, as is likely the case for many people.
She said, "but you can't think about only the future value"
She is right.
But I reminded her of some other things. Firstly, I took her back to a little over four years ago when I started on this journey and the economic position we were in and how terrible it was for everyone concerned. I reminded her how we pulled ourselves through it and all the work it took during the day to make ends meet. I then reminded her of all the work I did at night in the darkness, in order to build a position in crypto.
I then reminded her that a little over a year ago when we found this house and she wanted to pass up on it because we didn't know how we would pay for it, I said, let's take the risk. It'll be alright. I will work it out.
I then asked her,
"Can you imagine me saying that four years ago?"
It was rhetorical. She didn't need to answer.
I haven't used any crypto yet, but it doesn't mean it hasn't changed my life. It has fundamentally changed me at the core and while I work my ass off daily still and spend the nights doing what I always have - I do not have that sense of fear for the first time in I do not know how many years, perhaps ever. My parents were not rich people and while they always remained close, after they went their separate ways, I was largely left to fend for myself. I wasn't always alone, but much of the time I felt that fear of not having enough, always living in scarcity.
So, while I haven't needed to use it, crypto has become a safety net of sorts that sits there in the background, while we live our lives within our working means, our traditional working means that is. I have been able to make a move that I wouldn't have earlier because of it and then know that I don't need it, I can still make ends meet. Yes, I work two jobs to be able to do this and my wife works as well, but, it is not only possible, but sustainable long-term.
Many people dream of retirement, to be able to do what they please without having to work for it. I dream of being able to work, without having to worry about the money I earn to be the motivating factor. I want to be able to turn up to work each day and put in my best, knowing that I am doing it because I want to, not because I need to. I don't need to chase a promotion for a payrise, I can get promoted because I am eager to do the work it entails. I don't have to put up with problems to keep my job, I solve them because I am interested enough and think it adds value. I don't help others for reward, I help because I choose to.
The goal is to get into a position where my time can't be bought. In order to get my time, I have to see the value in giving it to one thing over another. I have some very highly paid friends who hate what they do, but do it because the money is good and they like to build their wealth. They are not slaves to debt as they live debt free, but they are slaves.
It is strange at times when I talk to them and I see the stress on their faces and hear it in the tiredness in their voices as they recount some challenge at work. I think back to four years ago when I had all the same stresses plus more, as I needed to do the work, there was no safety net, no backup plan, no savings in the bank, no space to stop.
I work more now - it doesn't feel like it.
They say that time "flies when you are having fun" and they also say, "life is too short to worry". This should mean that if you want a longer life, you should spend time worrying, not having fun - but it will still be too short.
After lunch, we walked through a department store and Smallsteps asked when we could go home and play. I said that soon, but I just want to look for one thing first. While my wife distracted her for a moment, I found what I was looking for and then led her over with her eyes closed. When she opened them, I had placed a plastic hula-hoop around her waist and her eyes lit up.
"This is a good surprise!"
Often, we can't imagine something because we expect to know how we are going to feel before it happens. My daughter thought she couldn't be surprised if she was with us. Four years ago, I couldn't predict what today would feel like.
There is a long way to go on this journey for me.
There will be more surprises.
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]
