Whilst having lunch with my supervisor today, we found ourselves talking about human behavior, as we often do. It was just the two of us, so we could vent a little also, which is also needed. She like me, is interested in processes and the dynamics in play that affect outcomes and how we as people affect and are affected. For me, it is fascinating, which is why so much of my content creation centers around my observations of behavior.
One of the many things that were covered was how people (myself included) don't want to close the gaps in their understanding and they would rather stay in their comfort zone, because it is far more convenient. This impacts on many parts of our experience, yet how much of it is actually beneficial to us, how much value does staying comfortable bring?
Last night in a team meeting we were asked about our work from home thoughts and where we thought we were the most effective. This is a touchy topic these days, because people seem to have an intuition about what works for them, but most haven't really explored it or crunched the numbers. We tend to see the upside of it, but we don't create the cons list.
Working from home is more convenient for the person in many ways, but to believe that it is better requires more thought than convenience. Even the arguments about open-plan offices and distractions, need more thought than most give, because getting distracted in the workplace, isn't necessarily a bad thing. Value isn't only found in what you think needs to be done at any given point of time, it can also come from random interaction. It is like being on the bus listening to your favorite song and getting interrupted by your soulmate, then being annoyed and tell them to go away. Which is more valuable?
And this is one of the challenges we have in terms of evaluating value, because convenience is a "now" value and favoring the convenient moment doesn't mean that what is being done right now, is actually valuable. And yeah, people say "live in the moment", which is fine, but time is just a series of moments, which means that the future is going to be full of moments to live also.
Are the future moments less valuable than the present moment?
In some ways yes, but if what we are doing in the present moment leads us to have terrible future moments, was the past moment worth it? For instance, if you ate whatever food you wanted, whenever you wanted for the next five years of moments, how would you feel in that final moment? Are you happy with yourself, are you glad you lived your truth, are the now present moments appreciated?
Convenient now...
is rarely convenient later.
Through the conversation I mentioned how people value convenience over value, even if they know it is in their best interest to go the other way. So many I know will choose not to do what they know they should to get the results they want, because it is inconvenient. So, they work out all kinds of strategies to avoid having to do what they know they will eventually have to do anyway. Which, just makes it harder later.
Tee, tai itke ja tee.
This is perhaps my favorite Finnish saying.
(I only know a couple)
It translates as "Do, or cry and do"
Either way, you are going to have to do it, so why add crying on top? Why not just suck it up and get on with it, get it out of the way, progress so time, energy and attention can be spent on something else more likeable?
And I think that this is changing in culture these days, where people are less resilient to the feeling of discomfort, probably because we are able to insulate and surround ourselves with what we like, what we enjoy, what is easy, passive, convenient. We can curate so much of our on-demand lives that when we do meet something that we have to do, we struggle to overcome it, complaining, whining, crying.
Resistant to change, not resilient to change.
We will through up all kinds of walls to try and stop the inevitable, but inevitably, they all fail, they all crumble under the tide. And even when we run to the hills, we are going to meet new challenges that will demand our time and attention. There are always hurdles to face, this is life.
Life is not convenient.
It is messy and unpredictable. It is filled with constant pushing and pulling, opposing forces of what we want and what we can have, what is possible, and what is out of reach. When we choose the line of most convenience, we are going to miss the parts of life that make all the shit worth it, the real value. The fulfilling career, the sense of purpose we crave and the people who we will love with all we have, and mourn with all we have when we lose them.
A good life is incredibly inconvenient.
Perhaps some people are able to build strong enough walls to keep the discomfort at bay, but what kind of life are they living - prisoners of convenience.
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]
