Obsolete thoughts are not actually obsolete, unless a huge group of people starts to accept it to be. Outdated, obsolete, and many more similar and familiar words are often used by many who are maybe silent or rage up but in both scenarios are victims. Yes, I am indeed no professional psychologist but, I am a human with the sense of right and wrong inbuilt, just like everyone else.
Once you accuse a victim of being a victim and call it outdated and an exaggeration, hello? you are purely disrespecting that person. Not only disrespecting, but your insult could also cause him/her more mental damage than you can imagine. Here, you are not only causing a very critical issue but you are not even a tiny bit helping it.
We very easily judge someone, without ever analyzing how they might be feeling. We forget that they are also humans, and they have their own struggles, we forget that when they say something, even if it is exaggerated from your end, it might have a bigger place in their life. How about we start putting ourselves in others' shoes?
Let us take a peek into this small conversation.
Scene 1:
A: "You are hurting me again, stop doing this!"
B: "You are overreacting."
Scene 2:
A: "You are hurting me again, stop doing this!"
B: "When do I do anything differently?"
Scenario:
What is happening? A is trying to pass on a piece of information about themselves, about what they are feeling while B is trying to give their opinion of that information of A to A; which is clearly not important. Let us look into it deeply.
In both, the scenario it is clear that A is trying to pass on the information that he/she is hurt by the words of B and is directing B to stop saying those words. B, being the persistent one is trying to say back something, may it be for his/her ego problem or an expression of being arrogant.
In Scene 1, while A is trying kind of begging for B to stop saying hurtful words, which B clearly thinks they aren't saying, B reacts to it by exaggerating the emotions of A. This makes A feel more vulnerable. While A actually spoke up and tried to stop the entire event, B was ignorant enough to only think of themselves. Sometimes we become B, thinking what we are saying is only right, we forget that A has emotions and that is the prior focus. Sometimes, A don't even voice out, they suffered inside, making it tougher even for themselves to solve.
In Scene 2, B is totally being an arrogant egoistic person, who is too much proud of they themselves speak. What happens in this case, is that B is too blinded to even understand what A is saying. B is in their best defensive mood while trying their best to maintain who they are, trying to create an impression, without much analysis of how are they actually portraying themselves.
In both the scenarios, B's are to be more understanding. We as humans, do not tend to hurt anyone, right? But, what happens is that when we try to become defensive, to save ourselves we eventually hurt others. That is not right, that can never be.
When A is hurt, B is to acknowledge that. Acknowledging has many steps to it. Saying sorry is part of it. Let me leave it up to you all to decide what B is supposed to do. At least we know what B should not do. If you are B, stop harassing the one at hurt. If you are A, then start loving yourself more, so that you reach that level when you can understand what is better for you and what is not.
The End!
In HIVE, I have realized that here we have the freedom of speech and the scope for sharing is quite HIGH. So, why do we not utilize this rather continue to ignore, dismiss, and disrespect? Being a human, I am content and I hope we all are, as we have come across, some or so many hurdles and observed, tiny or huge changes in this, universe or life. With this, I would like to end today's discussion and also, I indeed hope we all understand how to be more cautious about the feelings of others. While you give respect it might not be always that you will earn it back, but definitely, you will leave your mark for sure.
{Cover- Source}
The first release: Mental illness a censured sickness (Part One)
The second release: Mental illness a censured sickness (Part Two)