She typed a word; but then she erased it. She typed again and this time it was five words; she pressed the backspace again. Whatever she was typing in, wasn't much to her liking. She wanted to write something different but she was never really satisfied with what she wrote. She's a serious writer; maybe someday she'll be able to write short stories. She likes stories but like I say she's a novice and after months of trying to write something meaningful, she was aggrieved. It takes years of practice to write good contents and she's way far behind. She started late and she'll get to "her" designated point later than others. You remember the hare and the turtle race? She thinks she's the turtle but she couldn't see the hare; or maybe this time around the hare has already got to the end of the line. But she being a turtle doesn't mind if she loses the race as long as she gets to the finish line. Oftentimes it frustrates her why she can't get there sooner but there's no shortcut to being good at something. Even after agreeing and disagreeing with herself for countless times, she hopes that someday she'll be happy with what she wrote. She hopes that "someday" isn't too far away.
I often stumble around the idea from where to begin or where it may lead to. The problems of unsure, dwindling thoughts and lack in context. Suppose I start to write about how my day has started and what I'm seeing in the vicinity and from there the conversation takes a few steps backwards and forwards and then backwards again; then I tie them all with a nice little ribbon. See, I forgot to mention about the salt and pepper; that is a few funny remarks and whodunits.
I wonder if you face the same dilemma or not; but I do. In a way, even with a few missteps, what I try to convey will eventually make sense. And why wouldn't it? I mostly write about life and people and emotions and the trot around the topics related to all that. Perhaps using a fictional element would make it easier to write but then again writing something fictional isn't as easy as it seems. But one thing is sure, we are all here for something; to write, to earn, to communicate, to be independent. With that being said, I too have my goals; apart from being independent, the rest of the items on the list are somewhat unchecked. I believe I'm independent so that goal is achieved. Perhaps my other goal is to write better every next time and not leave my post undone.
To write or not to write (pardon my Shakespearian) that is the question; I say why not write.I often write, let's say 6 days a week. It's not out of habit but I'm practicing. Practice makes a man perfect but in my case the practice might help me to make my posts more sense. See, I started writing about where to begin and ended up here in the middle of how-to-be-confusing. It's not that confusing and hopefully it will all make sense in the end. It's better to be confusing than going in circles and that too I do sometimes. You know, going in circles, writing the same thing over and over again with little changes; I go through hard times writing something long enough. By long enough I mean around above 650 words and that is tough without putting in confusing materials.
I can talk all day about how tough it is to write but the toughest effort is to start because once you start then it all falls into places; the places that you designate them to fall. I don't have any expertise to tell you about any of the things I have mentioned; I myself am at a loss of words. But why am I saying any of this to you is so that you know how much I understand this predicament; I guess I'm hoping that you'd acknowledge the difficulty you face too. And maybe you'd say "Girl, you're not in this alone." Too much? Starting is important whether I say enough or not enough; whether it gets mundane or turns nonsensical.
It's all a জগাখিচুড়ি
