I would like him to be more careful. Why does not he understand what I want? Does not he even know that I'm disturbed by her gesture? Does not he realize I am annoyed by this attitude? - thoughtless and unspoken phrases directed against people who can not even guess what we feel ...
So often we hesitate to express our feelings that we lose our communication and we forget that those next to us can not guess our thoughts and have no way of knowing just what we want at a certain moment. Non-verbal language is not always relevant, facial expressions and gestures may fail or be understood in the same way. Silence can also be interpreted, and some get rid of the hidden meanings of a sigh or annoyed lifting of the eyebrows.
Then what remains to be done?
A word I like says "Many problems would disappear if we talk to each other and not to one another."
If you want to be treated properly, before you hate to be misunderstood, say clearly what your expectations are. Talk about your wishes and do not hesitate to express your opinion calmly. Think about what you have to say, then go out loud. Clarify misunderstandings with those around you, even when it may be more convenient to suppose they understand what your intentions are.
A common attitude is simply to show an angry face when the others do not conform to their own unspoken desires, hoping to punish them with a sly, we get their attention. Which usually does not happen, on the contrary: and the people beside us are getting stuck because we do not understand why we are upset and do not want to talk, and that's how we get into a sad vicious circle.
I have noticed that many people tend to hide behind the slogan "we know each other for so long, they need to know what I like, what I want." No matter how well someone knows you, you can not know all your thoughts and wishes at all times. It is not realistic to have the claim that others understand your dissatisfaction or wishes, if you are forbidden to express them.
Sure, by saying what we have in the heart does not mean that we will automatically receive what we want or that we will be treated as we want, but the chances for the other to understand us grow considerably. We know, at least, that we did what we had and expressed our own position.
