On the road and out of love - and she's still not over it after a year!!!
Backstory; I was with my ex for almost 4 years, we didn't get to see each other often as neither of us had our own transport and lived two hours apart but as far as I knew we were more than happy. To be honest, I thought within the next year we would be engaged and have our own place... but last year he broke up with me seemingly out of nowhere whilst I was away from him on an extended holiday (ruining a once in a lifetime experience for me). First of all, this itself crushed me as I had been away on this holiday for two months, I had three weeks left before I was back home and he couldn't wait until then to end our relationship, instead choosing to break up with me on the phone (also a month before our 4 year anniversary, which we had already made plans for). His reason was that he couldn't deal with not seeing me, but we only had a few weeks left so that was illogical to me. *He also mentioned that he felt as though we were 'more like friends than a couple'. I didn't argue with him at the time because I felt like it was a pretty shitty move on his part, I was miles away and I couldn't do anything about it except talk on a phone to him. So I planned to give him space and reach out to him when I was back, I figured he was stressed about the distance and he'd come around. [...] Two weeks after the break up I noticed he and a girl [24] who lives in his town had added each other on all social media (she's related to one of his friends) and later a mutual friend confirms that they're dating. I've never really opened up to anyone about it because it left me feeling so down and unwanted, as though our relationship meant nothing to him, I didn't understand how he could have moved on already. The best revenge seemed to be 'act as though I don't care'
So ...
- You decided to travel for a while and he didn't feel great about this, which added to his doubts.
- You haven't ever really connected deeply with him and some other girl noticed this.
- While you were away, another girl jumped on the chance to take him away from you.
- You were away, so whatever reason she had was better than yours since you were gone and she was there.
Adventures can be fun, but if you're in a relationship, they can be the end of that relationship if they're long adventures. Not only are you leaving your partner, you're opening the door for competition to jump in and take what you feel belongs to you. In this case, all she had to do was show that she was there for him, while you couldn't do that.
The smartest person in your story is the other girl. She not only recognized what your ex-boyfriend needed, she also knew how to outsmart you to get him.
If your partner went on a long adventure, would you end it, or just wait until he or she returned?
Image h/t Pixabay