Episode 6
Scene 1
Blackjack and The Blazing Muffin crew are confronting a swarm of Awashi pirates.
Tom: What’s an Awashi pirate?
Pixel: Originally from Planet Awash, the Awashi developed an extremely brutal and rigid social hierarchy. They also tried to control the weather on their home planet, which eventually led to the destruction of their ecosystem, making it uninhabitable.
Tom: So they’ve been space pirates ever since?
Pixel: No. After abandoning Planet Awash, the survivors took over one of Awash’s moons, which had a small, anarchic, indigenous population, many millenia younger than the Awashi. The Awashi enslaved most of them, and killed the rest.
Tom: So they took over one of Awash’s moons, and now that’s their home world?
Pixel: No. They tried to control the weather again, and destroyed the moon’s ecosystem. The survivors of that left and became space pirates with no home world.
Pokher: I hate to interrupt this invaluable history lesson, but we’ve got five Awashi vessels to deal with.
Blue: That’s strange. None of their craft have weapons aimed at us.
Blackjack: Are you sure?
Computer: Confirmed.
Pixel: The lead ship is opening a communication channel.
Blackjack: Keep shields up, and let’s have a chat.
A long faced, pale Awashi appears on the viewscreen of The Blazing Muffin.
Awashi: I am Rogue.
Blackjack: Your name is Rogue?
Rogue: Yes.
Blackjack: Ok. I’m Blackjack. Why did you send a distress signal of the Bling species?
Rogue: If we had sent an Awashi signal, would you have answered?
Blackjack: Obviously not. We try to avoid violent, thieving control freaks. No offense.
Rogue: None taken. My people have acted disgracefully for tens of thousands of years.
Everyone on The Blazing Muffin gets confused looks.
Rogue: Our ancestors were indigenous survivors on Windswept, one of Awash’s moons.
Pokher: We’re familiar with that part of your history. What does this have to do with you sending a false distress signal?
Rogue: We need help. We have escaped the Awashi hierarchy, but they’ll come for us. We need help hiding.
Blackjack: Be more specific.
Rogue: We need different codes and frequencies for our shields, weapons, and propulsion systems.
Blackjack: How did you get the Bling distress signal?
Rogue: It was in the Awashi database.
Tom: Ask them how they got control of those ships.
Rogue: I can hear you, ya know. We have taken control of these Awashi vessels.
Pokher: You mutinied?
Rogue: It was necessary to gain our freedom and have a chance at a different life.
Blackjack: Please wait while I talk with my shipmates.
Screen goes blank.
Blackjack: Do you believe them?
Half say yes.
Pokher: Even if the story of their ancestors is true, a few generations have passed since then. How can we know that they have kept any anarchistic knowledge or customs?
Pixel: True. They could be playing to our sensibilities.
Blue: They are a clever and tricky species.
Tom: But you can’t judge all of them based on the actions of others in their species. Look at me, for example. There are billions of humans you didn’t want on your ship, but you were ok with me.
Blackjack: Tom makes a solid point. But what could we actually do for them, that wouldn’t compromise our own security?
Pixel: I could help them create their own frequencies and mask their systems from the Awashi.
Tom: I could help, too.
Everyone looks at Tom with great uncertainty.
Tom: What? I’ve been learning your tech and practicing on your simulation system.
Computer: That’s true, and he’s getting quite good.
Blackjack: Ok, we’ll help them. Get them back onscreen.
Computer: Uh-oh.
Pokher: Oh, what now?
Computer: Three much larger Awashi craft are approaching. They have weapons aimed at the rogue vessels.
Blue: Not at us?
Pixel: Not yet.
Blackjack: Well, that erases any doubt about Rogue’s truthfulness. See if you can open a channel to him.
Pixel: Their communication lines are down, but he sent a message before that happened. It’s the shield frequency for Awashi ships.
Computer: The Awashi are firing on two of the rogue vessels! And they’re firing back!
Blackjack: Pixel, get the frequency generator ready to disable their shields. When their shields are down, fire a full spread at them with the psychedelic mind-mess machine.
Tom: What the heck is a psychedelic mind-mess machine?
Pokher: A frequency that causes happy hallucinations for a few minutes, neutralizing their desire and ability to attack.
Blackjack: Then hit their engines with a matter changing missile.
Tom: What the heck is that?
Pokher: A missile that rearranges molecules, kind of like the food generators we use on the ship. One of those missiles will change whatever it strikes into a random food.
Blue: One of the rogue ships has been destroyed!
Pixel: Ok, I’ve got everything programmed.
Blackjack: Fire!
There is a brief and brilliant flash as the Awashi vessels lose their shielding temporarily. Psychedelic effects begin to take hold in the minds of the Awashi, and they start to stare into space, literally and figuratively. One of their engines slowly starts to turn into a carrot.
Computer: Rogue is hailing us.
Blackjack: Rogue, run while you can. Follow us and we’ll help you!
Rogue: Thank you Blackjack.
The four remaining Rogue ships and The Blazing Muffin streak away to temporary safety. While they make their escape, Rogue calls Blackjack.
Blackjack: So what’s your plan now? You can’t hide forever.
Rogue: I would like to seek out a planet to call home.
Blackjack: Tired of being space vagabonds?
Rogue: Not necessarily, but settling down might increase our chances of avoiding The Awashi. We have limited time to find a place, though.
Pokher: Why is that?
Rogue: Our ships are not equipped with food and water supplies to last very long.
Blackjack (stunned): Those are Awashi ships, right? How do The Awashi survive?
Rogue: By plunder, of course.
Blackjack looks around at his crew. They all appear sympathetic.
Blackjack: I’ll tell ya what. We’ll help you install tech for food and water production. This will help you survive as long as you wish in space. Also, if you can prove that you have abandoned the Awashi ways of violence and coercion for a period of time, then I’ll have my friends and family on Planet Bling help you settle there.
Rogue (shocked): You’d do that for us?
Blackjack: I’m judging you based on what actions I’ve seen you take, not on the reputation of your species.
Rogue: I might remind you that The Awashi are not my species exactly. Our ancestors were originally from Windswept.
Pokher: Do you wish to be known as Windsweepers?
Rogue: It is a good name.
Blue: There is a star base of my people, The Swig, near here. We can stop there while we upgrade the Windsweepers’s ships.
Blackjack: Computer, set course for…
Computer interrupts (condescending): Yeah, yeah, I got it.
Blackjack (sarcastic): The first thing I’ll do is swap computers with you, Rogue.
End Episode 6
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