Dear lord, I love this place. I have a lot of moments of doubt, but days like today remind me of how I have ended up here for the meantime. Sure, it is lonely. Sure it is isolated. Sure, the most a grocery run in this town has to offer is a block of cheese and an avocado. But god damn, is it beautiful, and is it special. There’s not many places on this continent that you can go for a couple hours hike on a 75 degree day and find yourself on a big field of snow underneath a leering ridgeline such as you’ll find at Mount Hood.
I set off with the intentions of building some features and getting some clips these last couple of days. I happily failed to do so, for the sole reason of having too much fun. Not a bad problem to have, in any circumstance. Last week, I had stashed my shovel away amongst the rocks for a coworker to use and so, more selfishly, I did not have to carry it back up the hike. However, since the last time Matty had used it, it had snowed, melted, and…
I woke up early to get up there with as much of the day left as possible. I don’t have notifications for Instagram turned on, because I try to use the app as little as possible; but I just happened to check instagram while I was fighting the battle to get out from under the covers. A friend of mine had sent me a screenshot of someone else’s story, attached with the message “is this yours?” Indeed, someone had found my “lost” shovel, and had instructed the owner to contact them for pick up. Good intentions on their part, but it did kind of cause a kerfluffle in my morning. Do I wait to hear back from them? Or do I just go up without a shovel?
It turns out, the latter would have been the much better choice. But I didn’t want to be up there and have a moment of regret, so I foolishly waited to get my shovel back before heading up. By the time my backpack was stuffed and ready, my water filled, and my shovel back in my hands, it was already noon. By a stroke of luck, however, as I was only a quarter mile up, a lift maintenance truck pulled over and told me to hop in the bed of the truck. They just happened to be on their way to prepare for the yearly inspection of Palmer; the very top lift that has been closed for over a month now. So I got a ride to the base of it, which eliminated a solid 1/3 of the hike. And the worst third, in my opinion.
Ironically I find the “easiest” part of the hike the worst. But once up at the bottom of Palmer, a lift that only exists for summer skiing, the hike gets more strenuous; but the destination is in clear view. The start of the hike looks so far away, with my poor eyesight all I can see is a glint from the sun on the large van windows. At this point, I measure the hike by the Palmer lift towers. About six towers up, I found my old jump, and decided this was a good place to take a break. Somewhat disappointedly, I had half expected myself to spend the whole day in this spot.. but after an hour of shoveling, I discovered the narrowing of the strip of snow that occurred over the last week left a difficult in run and dangerous landing. I had gotten some energy back, so I dropped some gear here and set off for the summit.
Ok, I lied- when I say “summit”, I just mean the top of Palmer. Summiting Mount Hood at this time of year, especially with the poor snow year, is extremely dangerous. Downright dumb to attempt; this is when people who try have to get airlifted out, or worse. I just wanted to see how high I could safely go up. After another short break at mid station, I continued the hike.
Although there is certainly a sharp decline in the number of people making the hike up over the past month, I still managed to run into a couple fellow lost souls still chasing the snow at the end of summer. I made a Portland buddy who comes up to work at the resort in the winter time. He actually flagged me down looking for a lost friend of his; and we ended up spending an hour just shooting the shit while trying to locate said friend. We eventually did, and parted ways as they had to get back to the city. I didn’t last much longer.. I was hoping to survive off the apple and banana I had in the van, but after that hike.. I needed something much more substantial. So I reluctantly headed down.
It took me three tries to stop my phone from autocapitalizing “apple”. It’s a food, for Christ’s sake. They’re really tryna make everything about themselves 😂
The rest of my evening was pretty much just laying in the van. Which I am totally okay with. It feels GOOD to be this depleted; and I gotta take advantage of the weather before it turns wet and cold again; and it’s coming soon. A million things I need to do; but I’m okay with putting my mental health first. I really needed today; this town in the off season really makes one feel like they are stuck in a rut. I managed to leave my shovel back in the same spot- hopefully it stays this time. I know the risk I am taking; but other than the weight factor, I need as little muddy shit in the van as possible. Life continues to feel better and better slowly, my anxiety and self-doubt lessening day by day. Mental health is not a linear curve, and of course I have plenty of down days; but the overall improvement is not up for debate.
My ears are always open to anyone and everyone going through rough times, so if you feel like you have no one to talk to; my door is open. Much love everyone. I promise you are worth it 🖤